1. How did Jesus set a perfect example of self-sacrifice?

WHEN Jesus was on earth, he set a perfect example of self-sacrifice. He put God’s will above his own desires and comforts. (John 5:30) By remaining faithful to death on the torture stake, he proved that there was no limit to what he was willing to sacrifice for others.​—Philippians 2:8.

2. How can we have a spirit of self-sacrifice? Why should we have it?

² As followers of Jesus, we too need to show the spirit of self-sacrifice. What does it mean to have a self-sacrificing spirit? It means that a person is willing to give up his own interests in order to help others. In a way, it is the opposite of selfishness. (Read Matthew 16:24.) Being unselfish can help us to put the feelings and personal preferences of others above our own. (Philippians 2:3, 4) Jesus taught that unselfishness is at the heart of our worship. How so? Christian love motivates us to have a self-sacrificing spirit. This love is what true disciples of Jesus are known for. (John 13:34, 35) Think of the blessings we have because we are part of a worldwide brotherhood that shows the spirit of self-sacrifice!

3. What might weaken our self-sacrificing spirit?

³ Still, we face an enemy that can slowly weaken our self-sacrificing spirit. That enemy is our tendency to be selfish. Think about how Adam and Eve were selfish. Eve showed a selfish desire to be like God, and her husband showed a selfish desire to please her. (Genesis 3:5, 6) After turning Adam and Eve away from true worship, the Devil continued to tempt people to be selfish. He even tried this with Jesus. (Matthew 4:1-9) In our day, Satan has been successful in misleading most people, and he influences them to show selfishness in many ways. If we are not careful, the selfish attitude of this world could affect us too.​—Ephesians 2:2.

4. (a) Can we remove selfish tendencies? Explain. (b) What questions will we discuss?

⁴ Selfishness may be compared to rust. If an iron object is exposed to air and water, it might begin to rust. Ignoring rust is very dangerous because if it is allowed to spread, it can cause a structure to collapse. Similarly, although we cannot remove our imperfection and selfish tendencies, we must continue fighting these tendencies. If we are not careful, our self-sacrificing spirit will be ruined. (1 Corinthians 9:26, 27) How can we recognize signs of selfishness in ourselves? And how can we improve our self-sacrificing attitude?

USE THE BIBLE TO CHECK FOR SELFISHNESS

5. (a) How is the Bible like a mirror? (See opening picture.) (b) When checking ourselves for selfishness, what must we avoid?

⁵ Just as we can use a mirror to check how we look, we can use the Bible to check our personality and correct any flaws we might find. (Read James 1:22-25.) However, a mirror will help us with our appearance only if we use it properly. For example, if we look at a mirror too quickly, we might not notice a small but serious flaw in our appearance. Or if we look into a mirror from an angle, we might see the image of someone else. In the same way, to use the Bible to check ourselves for a problem such as selfishness, we should do more than just read it quickly or use it to see someone else’s flaws.

6. How do we continue in the perfect law?

⁶ For example, we could read God’s Word every day and still not see selfish tendencies that are growing inside us. How is that possible? Think about this: In the illustration of the man who “looks at himself” in the mirror, James used a Greek word that means careful examination. So the man was looking carefully in the mirror, but there still was a problem. James continued: “He goes away and immediately forgets what sort of person he is.” Yes, he turned away from the mirror without doing anything about what he saw. In contrast, the successful man not only “peers into the perfect law” but also “continues in it.” So instead of forgetting the perfect law of God’s Word, he “continues in it,” or continues to follow its teachings. Jesus made a similar point when he said: “If you remain in my word, you are really my disciples.”​—John 8:31.

7. How can we use the Bible to check for selfish tendencies?

⁷ So to fight against selfish tendencies, you must first read God’s Word carefully. That may help you to see what you need to improve. But you need to do more than that. Do some research. When you are reading a Bible account, imagine that you were there. Ask questions such as: ‘How would I have acted in this situation? Would I have acted in the right way?’ Most important, after you meditate on what you have read, do your best to apply it. (Matthew 7:24, 25) Let us see how the accounts of King Saul and the apostle Peter can help us to maintain a spirit of self-sacrifice.

KING SAUL’S WARNING EXAMPLE

8. When Saul began ruling as king, what attitude did he have? How did he show this attitude?

⁸ King Saul is a warning for us about how selfishness can ruin our spirit of self-sacrifice. When Saul began ruling as king, he had a modest and humble opinion of himself. (1 Samuel 9:21) He humbly chose not to punish some Israelites who spoke badly about his rule, even though they were challenging the authority God had given him. (1 Samuel 10:27) King Saul accepted the guidance of God’s spirit by leading Israel in a successful battle against the Ammonites. Afterward, he humbly gave Jehovah the credit for the victory.​—1 Samuel 11:6, 11-13.

9. How did Saul start to become selfish?

⁹ Later, Saul allowed selfish thinking and pride to grow in his heart, just like rust that weakens metal. When he defeated the Amalekites in battle, he cared more about his own desires than about obeying Jehovah. Saul greedily kept the Amalekites’ possessions instead of destroying them as God had commanded. Saul was so proud that he even had a monument built for himself. (1 Samuel 15:3, 9, 12) When the prophet Samuel told him that Jehovah was displeased, Saul made excuses and focused on the part of Jehovah’s command that he did obey. He even blamed others for his error. (1 Samuel 15:16-21) Pride made Saul care more about his reputation than his friendship with God. (1 Samuel 15:30) How can we use Saul’s example as a mirror to help us keep the spirit of self-sacrifice?

10, 11. (a) What does Saul’s experience teach us about maintaining a self-sacrificing spirit? (b) How can we avoid following Saul’s bad example?

¹⁰ First, Saul’s experience teaches us not to become too confident in ourselves. A self-sacrificing spirit does not come automatically, so we must constantly work on it. (1 Timothy 4:10) Remember that Saul started off well and pleased God for a while, but he did not work hard to remove selfish tendencies that he began to have. Eventually, Jehovah rejected Saul for his disobedience.

¹¹ Second, we should not focus only on what we are doing well and ignore the things we need to improve. This would be like using a mirror to admire our new clothes while not noticing some dirt on our face. Even if we are not proud or overly confident as Saul was, we should avoid any tendency that could make us follow his bad example. If we receive counsel, let us not be like Saul and make excuses or blame someone else. It is much better to accept counsel willingly.​—Read Psalm 141:5.

12. How could the spirit of self-sacrifice help us if we were to commit a serious sin?

¹² However, what if we were to commit a serious sin? Saul wanted to save his reputation, and this kept him from repairing his friendship with Jehovah. In contrast, a spirit of self-sacrifice could motivate us to get help no matter how embarrassed we may feel. (Proverbs 28:13; James 5:14-16) For example, one brother began viewing pornography at the age of 12, and he continued to do so secretly for more than ten years. He says: “It was very hard to admit to my wife and to the elders what I’d been doing. But now that I have admitted it, I feel that a huge weight has been taken off my shoulders. Some of my friends were disappointed when I was removed as a ministerial servant, as if I had let them down. Yet, I know that Jehovah is more pleased with my service now than when I was watching pornography, and his view is the one that really matters.”

PETER’S ENCOURAGING EXAMPLE

13, 14. How did Peter show selfish tendencies?

¹³ The apostle Peter was self-sacrificing while he was being trained by Jesus. (Luke 5:3-11) But he still had to fight selfish tendencies. For example, he became angry when the apostles James and John asked Jesus for honored positions in the Kingdom of God. Maybe Peter thought that he should get one of those positions because Jesus had already said that Peter would have a special role. (Matthew 16:18, 19) Jesus warned James, John, Peter, and the rest of the apostles not to be selfish and act as if they were better than their brothers.​—Mark 10:35-45.

¹⁴ Even after Jesus tried to correct Peter’s thinking, Peter still showed selfish tendencies. When Jesus told the apostles that they would abandon him for a short time, Peter made the others look bad by saying that he would be the only one to stay faithful. (Matthew 26:31-33) He should not have been so confident in himself, because that same night, Peter failed to be self-sacrificing. He protected himself and denied knowing Jesus three times.​—Matthew 26:69-75.

15. Why does Peter’s example encourage us?

¹⁵ Even though at times Peter struggled and failed, his example encourages us. Because of his own effort and the help of God’s holy spirit, Peter was able to overcome his selfish tendencies. He later showed self-control and self-sacrificing love. (Galatians 5:22, 23) He endured many trials that he might not have been able to endure before. For example, when Paul gave Peter strong counsel in front of other people, Peter kept a humble attitude. (Galatians 2:11-14) After receiving that counsel, Peter did not hold a grudge and feel that his reputation was damaged. He continued to speak about Paul as his “beloved brother.” (2 Peter 3:15) Peter’s example helps us to improve our spirit of self-sacrifice.

16. How can we be self-sacrificing in difficult situations?

¹⁶ Think about how you react in difficult circumstances. When Peter and the apostles were thrown in prison and beaten because of their preaching, they were happy “to be dishonored” as followers of Jesus. (Acts 5:41) You too can use persecution as an opportunity to imitate Peter and be self-sacrificing like Jesus. (Read 1 Peter 2:20, 21.) This attitude could even help if you received discipline from the elders. Instead of becoming offended, follow Peter’s example.​—Ecclesiastes 7:9.

17, 18. (a) What questions could we ask about our goals? (b) What can we do if we notice a selfish tendency in our heart?

¹⁷ Peter’s example can also help you to set goals in your worship to Jehovah. You can work toward these goals in a self-sacrificing way. But be careful that you do not set goals because you want to be important. Ask yourself: ‘Why do I want to improve or do more for Jehovah? Is it because I want praise from others or more authority, as James and John wanted?’

¹⁸ If you notice selfishness growing in your heart, ask Jehovah to help you to correct your thinking and feelings. Then work harder for Jehovah’s glory and not your own. (Psalm 86:11) You can also set goals that will not bring attention to yourself. For example, you can try to improve in showing a quality of the fruitage of the spirit that is difficult for you. Or if you work hard to prepare your meeting parts but do not like to clean the Kingdom Hall, you could set a goal to apply the advice at Romans 12:16.​—Read.

19. What can we do so that we do not become discouraged by what we see in the mirror of God’s Word?

¹⁹ When we look carefully at ourselves in the mirror of God’s Word and see flaws or selfish tendencies, we might become discouraged. If that ever happens to you, remember the successful man in James’ illustration. James did not mention how quickly the man fixed the problems he saw or even that he was able to correct every flaw. But James did say that the man continued in “the perfect law.” (James 1:25) The man remembered what he saw in the mirror and kept working to improve himself. So keep a positive view of yourself, and remember that we all are imperfect. (Read Ecclesiastes 7:20.) Jehovah is willing to help you in the same way that he has helped so many of your brothers. If you follow the teachings in the Bible and continue to show the spirit of self-sacrifice, you will have God’s approval and blessing.

1. What blessings from Jehovah can help us to be happy?

JEHOVAH wants us to be happy, and he gives us so many blessings that should bring us happiness. For one thing, he has given us life. We can use our life to praise him, because God has drawn us to true worship. (Psalm 144:15; John 6:44) Jehovah assures us of his love, and he helps us so that we do not give up in our service to him. (Jeremiah 31:3; 2 Corinthians 4:16) We enjoy the spiritual paradise, which includes true peace and unity, a loving brotherhood, and regular reminders of Jehovah’s love for us. In addition to that, we have a precious hope for the future.

2. What do some faithful servants of God struggle with?

² Even though we have these reasons for happiness, some faithful servants of God struggle with negative thoughts about themselves. They may feel that Jehovah does not value them or their service to him. Those who have constant negative feelings may think that the idea of enjoying “many years” is just a dream. Life may feel like one dark day after another.​—Ecclesiastes 11:8.

3. What may cause negative feelings?

³ Such negative feelings may be caused by disappointments, illness, or getting older. (Psalm 71:9; Proverbs 13:12; Ecclesiastes 7:7) Also, we must realize that our heart is “treacherous” and that it can make us feel guilty even when God may be pleased with us. (Jeremiah 17:9; 1 John 3:20) The Devil spreads lies about God’s servants. Satan moved Eliphaz to say that we are worthless to God. That was a lie in Job’s day, and it still is today.​—Job 4:18, 19.

4. What will we discuss in this article?

⁴ In the Scriptures, Jehovah assures us that he will be with those who struggle with negative thoughts. (Psalm 23:4) One way he is with us is by means of his Word. The Bible is “powerful by God for overturning strongly entrenched things.” This means that it can change wrong or negative ideas about ourselves. (2 Corinthians 10:4, 5) So let us discuss how we can use the Bible to help us develop and maintain a positive viewpoint. You may personally benefit from this and also find ways to encourage others.

USE THE BIBLE TO DEVELOP A POSITIVE VIEWPOINT

5. What test can help us to have a positive viewpoint?

⁵ The apostle described some things that may help us to develop a positive viewpoint. He counseled the congregation in Corinth: “Keep testing whether you are in the faith.” (2 Corinthians 13:5) “The faith” is the entire collection of Christian beliefs revealed in the Bible. If we say and do what the Bible teaches, then we pass this test and show that we are “in the faith.” Of course, we cannot pick and choose which beliefs we will follow. We must obey all the Christian teachings in the Bible.​—James 2:10, 11.

6. Why should we test whether we are “in the faith”? (See opening picture.)

⁶ You might not want to take that test, especially if you think that you might fail. Yet, Jehovah’s opinion of us is more important than our own, because he knows much more than we do. (Isaiah 55:8, 9) He examines his worshippers, not to condemn them, but to find their good qualities and to help them. When you use God’s Word to test yourself to see “whether you are in the faith,” you will begin to understand how God feels about you. This can help you to avoid thinking that you are worthless and help you to remember God’s view: You are precious in his eyes. Remembering this can be like opening the curtains to let the sunshine into a dark room.

7. How can the example of faithful people mentioned in the Bible help us?

⁷ A good way to test ourselves is to meditate on the example of faithful people mentioned in the Bible. Compare their circumstances or feelings with yours, and see what you might have done in their situation. Let us look at three examples that illustrate how you can use the Bible to confirm that you are “in the faith.” This will also help you to develop a positive view of yourself.

THE POOR WIDOW

8, 9. (a) What were the circumstances of the poor widow? (b) What negative feelings might the widow have had?

⁸ At the temple in Jerusalem, Jesus watched a poor widow. Her example can help us to maintain a positive viewpoint even if we cannot do everything that we would like to do. (Read Luke 21:1-4.) Think about her circumstances. First of all, she had to endure the pain of losing her husband. At the same time, the religious leaders were greedy and stole from widows like her, instead of helping them. (Luke 20:47) She was so poor that the best contribution she could give to the temple was the same as what a worker could earn in just a few minutes.

⁹ Try to imagine how the widow might have felt as she entered the temple courtyard holding only two small coins. Would she be thinking about how small her contribution was compared with what she would have given when her husband was alive? When she saw the large donations of others, would she be embarrassed and feel that her contribution was worthless? Even if she had such feelings, she still gave what she had in order to support true worship.

10. How did Jesus show that the widow was valuable to God?

¹⁰ Jesus said that the widow and her contribution were valuable to Jehovah. He said that she gave more than all the rich people gave. Her contribution would be mixed in with what others gave, but Jesus especially appreciated her gift to Jehovah. Those who counted the temple contributions would never know how important those two small coins were to Jehovah or how precious the widow was to him. Still, God’s opinion was the one that really mattered, not what other people thought or even how the widow felt about herself. Can you use this account to test “whether you are in the faith”?

11. What can you learn from the account of the widow?

¹¹ Your circumstances may affect what you can give to Jehovah. Because of age or health problems, some are not able to spend as much time preaching as they would like. Should they feel that their field service time is not worth reporting? Even if you are younger or have good health, you might feel that your efforts are only a small part of the many hours that God’s people spend in worshipping him. The story of the poor widow teaches us that Jehovah notices and treasures every little thing we do for him, especially when our circumstances are difficult. Think about your worship to Jehovah during the past year. Did one of the hours you spent serving Jehovah require you to make a great sacrifice? If so, you can be sure that he values what you did for him during that hour. You prove that you are “in the faith” when you imitate the poor widow and do all you can for Jehovah.

“TAKE MY LIFE AWAY”

12-14. (a) What negative feelings did Elijah have? (b) Why might Elijah have felt as he did?

¹² The prophet Elijah was loyal to Jehovah and had strong faith. Yet, at one point he felt so disappointed that he asked Jehovah to put him to death, saying: “It is enough! Now, O Jehovah, take my life away.” (1 Kings 19:4) Those who have never felt so desperate might think that Elijah’s prayer was just “wild talk.” (Job 6:3) But his feelings were real. Note that rather than becoming angry with Elijah, Jehovah helped him.

¹³ Why did Elijah have such feelings? Shortly before this, Elijah performed a miracle that proved that Jehovah is the true God. After this miracle, 450 prophets of Baal were executed. (1 Kings 18:37-40) Elijah likely hoped that God’s people would now return to pure worship, but that did not happen. Wicked Queen Jezebel sent a message to Elijah that she was going to kill him. Fearing for his life, Elijah ran south from Israel across the land of Judah into the wilderness.​—1 Kings 19:2-4.

¹⁴ While Elijah was alone in the wilderness, he began to think that his work as a prophet was for nothing. He told Jehovah: “I am no better than my forefathers.” He felt as useless as the dust and bones of his dead ancestors. In his opinion, he was a failure and had no value to Jehovah or to anyone else.

15. How did God show Elijah that He still valued him?

¹⁵ But the Almighty had a different opinion of Elijah. Elijah remained valuable to Jehovah, and he made sure that Elijah knew that. God sent an angel to strengthen him. Jehovah also gave Elijah food and drink that would help him endure his 40-day trip south to Mount Horeb. When Elijah felt that no other Israelites had remained faithful to Jehovah, God kindly corrected his wrong idea. Notice, too, that Jehovah gave Elijah new assignments, which he accepted. Elijah was helped by Jehovah, and as a result, he had new energy and returned to his work as a prophet.​—1 Kings 19:5-8, 15-19.

16. How has Jehovah strengthened you?

¹⁶ You can use Elijah’s experience to confirm that you are “in the faith” and to develop a positive attitude. First, think of the ways Jehovah has supported you. Has an elder or another mature Christian given you help at the right time? (Galatians 6:2) Have the Bible, our Christian publications, and the meetings helped you to feel that Jehovah cares about you? The next time you are helped in one of these ways, think about where this help really comes from, and remember to thank Jehovah in prayer.​—Psalm 121:1, 2.

17. What does Jehovah value in his servants?

¹⁷ Second, remember that a negative viewpoint can mislead us. God’s opinion of us is what really matters. (Read Romans 14:4.) Jehovah values our devotion and our faithfulness to him. Our value to Jehovah does not depend on how much we do for him. It could be that, like Elijah, you have done more for Jehovah than you realize. You have probably helped others in the congregation without knowing it. And people in the territory may have heard the truth because of your hard work.

18. What does your assignment from Jehovah prove?

¹⁸ Finally, think of each assignment from Jehovah as proof that he is pleased with you. (Jeremiah 20:11) Like Elijah, you might be discouraged if your service seems unsuccessful or if goals in your service to Jehovah seem impossible to reach. Yet, you still have the greatest honor that any of us can have. This is the honor to preach the good news and to be called one of Jehovah’s Witnesses. So stay faithful to Jehovah. Then, as Jesus said, you will be able to “enter into the joy of your master.”​—Matthew 25:23.

THE “PRAYER OF THE OPPRESSED ONE”

19. How did the writer of Psalm 102 feel?

¹⁹ The writer of Psalm 102 was desperate. He was “oppressed,” that is, he was suffering great physical or emotional pain. He was also “in despair,” which meant that he did not have the strength to endure his problems. (Psalm 102, superscription) All he could think about was his pain, his loneliness, and his own feelings. (Psalm 102:3, 4, 6, 11) He believed that Jehovah wanted to throw him away.​—Psalm 102:10.

20. How can prayer help someone who is fighting negative thoughts?

²⁰ Yet, the psalmist could still use his life to praise Jehovah. (Read Psalm 102:19-21.) Psalm 102 shows us that even those who are “in the faith” can be in pain and may not be able to think about anything else. “Like a solitary bird on a roof,” the psalmist felt lonely, as if he were surrounded only by problems. (Psalm 102:7) If you ever feel that way, pour out your heart to Jehovah, as the psalmist did. Your prayers can help you to fight negative thoughts. Jehovah promises that “he will pay attention to the prayer of the destitute; he will not despise their prayer.” (Psalm 102:17) Trust his promise.

21. If we become discouraged, how can we get a more positive viewpoint?

²¹ Psalm 102 also shows how you can get a more positive viewpoint. The psalmist chose to think about his friendship with Jehovah. (Psalm 102:12, 27) He was comforted to know that Jehovah would always be there to help His people to endure trials. So if you are discouraged and this keeps you from doing as much as you want to in God’s service, pray about it. Ask God to hear your prayer not only so that you will find relief from your problem but also “so that the name of Jehovah will be declared.”​—Psalm 102:20, 21.

22. How can each of us please Jehovah?

²² Yes, we can use the Bible to prove to ourselves that we are “in the faith” and are valuable to Jehovah. It is true that in Satan’s world we may not be able to get rid of all negative feelings or discouragement. However, all of us can please Jehovah and have everlasting life if we faithfully endure in his service.​—Matthew 24:13.

1. What sad situation do humans face today?

JEHOVAH never wanted humans to suffer, become weak, and grow old. His purpose was that men and women enjoy perfect health in Paradise. But now “all creation keeps on groaning together and being in pain.” (Romans 8:22) How do you think God feels when he sees humans suffer the tragic results of sin? It is sad to see that many elderly ones are neglected at a time when they need more assistance.​—Psalm 39:5; 2 Timothy 3:3.

2. Why are Christians very grateful to have elderly ones in the congregations?

² Jehovah’s people are grateful that there are elderly ones in the congregations. We benefit from their wisdom, and we want to follow their example of faith. Many of us are related to these dear older ones. Yet, whether we are related to elderly brothers and sisters or not, we want to make sure that they are well cared for. (Galatians 6:10; 1 Peter 1:22) It will benefit all of us to examine how God feels about the elderly. We will also discuss the responsibilities of family members and the congregation to care for our dear older ones.

“DO NOT CAST ME OFF”

3, 4. (a) What sincere request did the writer of Psalm 71 make to Jehovah? (b) What can elderly members of the congregation ask God to do?

³ Psalm 71:9 says: “Do not cast me off in my old age; do not abandon me when my strength fails.” It was probably David who wrote these words. He served God his entire life, and Jehovah used him to do great things. (1 Samuel 17:33-37, 50; 1 Kings 2:1-3, 10) Although he had done so much for Jehovah, David had grown old and felt the need to ask Jehovah to take care of him.​—Read Psalm 71:17, 18.

⁴ Many today are like David. Even though they are getting older and face “days of distress,” they do their best to praise God. (Ecclesiastes 12:1-7) Many of them may not be able to do as much as they did before, even in the ministry. But they too can beg Jehovah to continue to bless and take care of them. Such faithful older ones can be sure that God will answer their prayers. We know this because Jehovah inspired David to pray about the same reasonable concerns.

5. How does Jehovah feel about faithful older ones?

⁵ Jehovah greatly values faithful older ones and expects his servants to honor them. (Psalm 22:24-26; Proverbs 16:31; 20:29) Leviticus 19:32 says: “Before gray hair you should rise up, and you must show honor to an older man, and you must be in fear of your God. I am Jehovah.” Yes, honoring the older ones in the congregation was a serious responsibility when those words were written, and it still is today. But whose responsibility is it to care for them?

THE FAMILY’S RESPONSIBILITY

6. What example did Jesus set in caring for his mother?

⁶ God’s Word tells us: “Honor your father and your mother.” (Exodus 20:12; Ephesians 6:2) Jesus showed that this commandment is very important when he condemned the Pharisees and scribes who refused to care for their parents. (Mark 7:5, 10-13) Jesus himself set a good example. Even when he was on the torture stake, he was concerned about his mother, who was probably a widow. He made sure that his dear friend and disciple John would take care of her.​—John 19:26, 27.

7. (a) What principle about families did Paul mention? (b) What did Paul also discuss?

⁷ In his letter to Timothy, the apostle Paul wrote that Christians should take care of their own families. (Read 1 Timothy 5:4, 8, 16.) He mentioned this principle while discussing who could receive financial support from the congregation. Paul said that Christian children, grandchildren, and other relatives had the main responsibility to care for elderly widows. By doing this, there would be no unnecessary expense for the congregation. Today, too, we prove that we love God by making sure that our relatives have what they need.

8. Why does the Bible not give specific instructions about caring for elderly parents?

⁸ Adult children should make sure that their parents are well cared for. Paul was talking about helping “believing” relatives, but parents who are not members of the Christian congregation should also not be neglected. Family situations are not all the same, so each family must make its own decisions about how care is provided. Each person’s health, needs, and personality is different. Some older ones have many children, but others have just one child. Some can get support from the government; others cannot. Also, those needing care have different preferences. It would not be wise or loving to criticize the choices of our brothers who are trying their best to care for aged relatives. Jehovah can bless any decision that is based on the Bible. He can make our decisions work, just as he has done for his people since ancient times.​—Numbers 11:23.

9-11. (a) What difficult decisions may some have to make? (See opening picture.) (b) Why should adult children not be quick to leave the full-time service? Give an example.

⁹ When parents and children live far apart, it can be difficult to give elderly parents the help they need. Children may suddenly have to visit Mom and Dad because of a fall, a broken bone, or some other serious problem. After that, parents may need assistance for a little while or even for a long time.a​—See footnote.

¹⁰ Those in the full-time service who have assignments far from home may have to make very difficult decisions. Bethelites, missionaries, and traveling overseers feel that their assignment is a precious blessing from Jehovah. Still, if their parents get sick, their first reaction might be, ‘We need to leave our assignment and return home to take care of our parents.’ However, it is wise to pray and think about what parents really need or want. No one should be quick to give up an assignment from Jehovah, and it may not always be necessary. Could the health problem be temporary? Would some in the parents’ congregation be happy to help the older ones and allow their children to continue in their assignment?​—Proverbs 21:5.

¹¹ For example, an elderly couple in East Asia had two sons who served far from home. One was a missionary in South America, and the other worked at world headquarters, in Brooklyn, New York. When their parents needed help, the sons and their wives went home to see what could be done. The missionary couple were seriously thinking about leaving their assignment to take care of their parents. Then they received a telephone call from the elders in the parents’ congregation. The elders had discussed the situation and wanted the missionaries to stay in their assignment as long as possible. They appreciated the couple’s service and offered to help them care for their parents. Imagine how all in the family appreciated the elders’ loving help!

12. When deciding how to care for the elderly, what should a Christian family make sure of?

¹² Whatever a Christian family decides to do to care for the needs of elderly parents, all should make sure that their decisions honor God’s name. We never want to be like the religious leaders in Jesus’ day. (Matthew 15:3-6) Instead, we want to honor Jehovah and the congregation.​—2 Corinthians 6:3.

THE CONGREGATION’S RESPONSIBILITY

13, 14. How does the Bible show that congregations should help care for elderly members?

¹³ Not all can help full-time servants as did the congregation mentioned above. But the Bible shows that congregations should do everything they can to help faithful older ones. In the Jerusalem congregation in the first century, “no one was in need among them.” This does not mean that all were rich. It actually seems that some had very little, but “distribution would be made to each one according to his need.” (Acts 4:34, 35) Later, though, there was a serious problem in that congregation. Some widows were not receiving “the daily distribution” of food. So, what did the apostles do? They assigned responsible men to make sure that the widows were treated fairly and given enough food. (Acts 6:1-5) This was necessary because at the time of Pentecost in the year 33, many foreign visitors became Christians and stayed in Jerusalem to strengthen their faith. So even though the distribution of food was just temporary, the apostles’ decision shows that congregations can help care for the needs of faithful older brothers and sisters.

¹⁴ Paul explained to Timothy when it would be appropriate for the congregation to help Christian widows with their material needs. (1 Timothy 5:3-16) James was inspired to write that Christians have the responsibility to care for orphans, widows, and others who suffer hard times. (James 1:27; 2:15-17) The apostle John too explained: “Whoever has the material possessions of this world and sees his brother in need and yet refuses to show him compassion, in what way does the love of God remain in him?” (1 John 3:17) So if individual Christians have the responsibility to care for those in need, then congregations have this responsibility too.

15. What can affect the care that may be needed for elderly brothers and sisters?

¹⁵ In some countries, the government may help the elderly by providing pensions and other programs. (Romans 13:6) In other places, such programs are not available. So how much care relatives and congregations need to give will depend on the situation. If believing children live far from their parents, it may affect how much the children can do. The children need to communicate with the elders of their parents’ congregation to make sure that all understand the family’s circumstances. For example, the elders may be able to help the parents find out what assistance the government can give to older ones. They may also notice things that the children need to know about, such as important letters that have not been opened or medicine that the parents have not taken. If the children and the elders communicate openly and clearly, they may be able to find solutions. When there is someone nearby to help or give advice to family members who live far away, this can prevent a situation from getting worse, and the family may worry less.

16. What have some Christians done to help older ones in the congregation?

¹⁶ Because they love these dear older ones, some Christians have volunteered their time and energy to help in any way they can. They treat such ones like their own family. To care for older ones, some take turns with others in the congregation. Even though they personally cannot be in the full-time service, these caring brothers and sisters may be able to help the children to stay in their assignments. Such brothers have an excellent attitude! Of course, no matter how much others help, children still have the responsibility to do what they can for their parents.

HONOR OLDER ONES WITH ENCOURAGING WORDS

17, 18. What attitude will make caregiving pleasant?

¹⁷ Older ones and those who care for them can make a difficult situation easier when they keep a positive attitude. Sometimes growing old can cause a person to become discouraged or even depressed. So special effort may be needed to honor and encourage older brothers and sisters. How can you do this? Keep conversations with them positive. These dear ones have remained faithful to Jehovah and should be commended. Jehovah does not forget all that they have done to serve him, and neither do we.​—Read Malachi 3:16; Hebrews 6:10.

¹⁸ Daily tasks will be much easier when everybody has a good sense of humor. (Ecclesiastes 3:1, 4) Also, many older ones try their best not to be demanding. They understand that they may receive more attention and visits if they are kind. Many who visit older ones often say, “I went to encourage an older friend, but I left feeling encouraged myself.”​—Proverbs 15:13; 17:22.

19. What can help young and old to stay strong during difficult times?

¹⁹ We look forward to the day when old age, suffering, and imperfection will end. Until that time, God’s servants must focus on their hope for a future that will last forever. Our faith in God’s promises keeps us strong during difficult times. Because we have faith, “we do not give up, but even if the man we are outside is wasting away, certainly the man we are inside is being renewed from day to day.” (2 Corinthians 4:16-18; Hebrews 6:18, 19) What else can help those who have the responsibility to care for older ones? Some helpful suggestions will be discussed in the next article.

1, 2. (a) What difficult challenges and questions do many families face? (b) How can parents and children be prepared for changing circumstances?

IT CAN be very painful to realize that your parents, who used to be strong and independent, can no longer take care of themselves. You may hear that Mom or Dad has fallen and broken a hip, has become confused and wandered off, or has been diagnosed with a serious illness. On the other hand, it can also be painful for older ones to accept changes in their health or circumstances, especially when this limits their independence. (Job 14:1) What can we do to help? How can they be cared for?

² An article on care for the elderly said that even though it can be difficult to talk about the problems of aging, families who plan ahead will be better prepared to make the right choices when health-care decisions have to be made. We must realize that the problems of old age cannot be avoided. That is why it is so important to prepare as a family. How can families lovingly work together to make these difficult decisions?

PLANNING FOR “DAYS OF DISTRESS”

3. What may families have to do when elderly parents begin to need more help? (See opening picture.)

³ The time comes when most parents are no longer able to take care of themselves and need help. (Read Ecclesiastes 12:1-7.) When this happens, elderly parents and their children should decide together what care would be best and what they can afford. It is wise to have a family meeting and discuss what kind of help is needed, how this help will be given, and how everyone can cooperate. All should do their best to be realistic and communicate openly. Can the parents continue living safely on their own?a (See footnote.) Talk about what each one can do so that parents receive the care they need. (Proverbs 24:6) Some may help by providing daily care, and others may be able to help by paying for health-care expenses. Everyone should know what his role is, but as time goes on, duties may change and family members may need to take turns caring for different responsibilities.

4. As circumstances change, where can family members find help?

⁴ As you begin caregiving, take time to learn as much as you can about your parent’s illness. If he or she has an illness that will continue to get worse, learn what you can expect to happen next. (Proverbs 1:5) Contact government offices in your area that provide services for the elderly. Find out what programs can help your parents to receive better care or can make your caregiving easier. As you think about these difficult changes, you may begin to have some unpleasant feelings, such as deep sadness, shock, or confusion. At these times, you can share your thoughts with a friend you trust. Most important, pour out your heart to Jehovah. He can give you the peace you need to accept and work through any situation.​—Psalm 55:22; Proverbs 24:10; Philippians 4:6, 7.

5. Why is it a good idea to learn about health-care options ahead of time?

⁵ It is a good idea for older ones and their families to learn about health-care options ahead of time. For example, they may find out whether it would be practical for a parent to live with a son or a daughter, live in a nursing home, or use other options available. In this way, families can prepare for the “trouble and sorrow” that happens with old age. (Psalm 90:10) Families who do not make plans may be forced to make decisions in a hurry when problems eventually come. This is almost always “the worst possible time to make such a decision,” says one expert. When decisions must be made quickly, family members may be under stress and may not agree on what should be done. However, when we plan ahead of time, it will be easier to adjust to changes.​—Proverbs 20:18.

6. Why is it helpful to talk about where and how elderly parents will live as they get older?

⁶ It may seem hard to talk with your parents about making changes in their home or about the need to move some day. Yet, many have said that these conversations helped them later. Why? Because it is easier to talk about difficult matters, listen respectfully, and make practical plans before problems arise. In a relaxed setting where family members can openly share their preferences, they will feel closer to one another and will remember the love they share. Older ones may want to live on their own for as long as possible. When parents talk with their children about what kind of care they would prefer, this will greatly help everyone if decisions about care have to be made.

7, 8. What should families talk about, and why?

⁷ Parents, during such a discussion, tell your family what your wishes are, how much money you are able to spend, and what options you prefer. Then, if one day you are not able to make decisions for yourself, they can make the decisions that you would have made. They will probably want to honor your wishes and do everything they can so that you can remain independent. (Ephesians 6:2-4) For example, do you expect one of your children to invite you to move in with his family? Or are you expecting something else? Be realistic and remember that other family members may have different ideas than you do. It takes time for all to adjust their thinking.

⁸ When we plan ahead and communicate well, we can avoid many problems. (Proverbs 15:22) Talk to your family about medical care and your preferences. The information on the Health Care Proxy that Jehovah’s Witnesses have should be used when having these conversations. Each person has the right to know about treatments that are available, and he has the right to accept or refuse treatment. An Advance Medical Directive document will show what a person’s wishes are. Choosing a health-care agent will allow someone you trust to make the appropriate decisions for you if needed. Older ones, caregivers, and health-care agents should have copies of the Health Care Proxy in case it is needed. Some older ones keep their Health Care Proxy with their will and other important documents about insurance, banking, contacts with government offices, and so on.

COPING WITH CHANGING CIRCUMSTANCES

9, 10. When may parents need more help from their children?

⁹ Many times, all in the family want the elderly to maintain their independence. As long as parents are able to cook, clean, take medication, and communicate well, children may not need to control every part of their parents’ life. However, as time passes, if it becomes difficult for parents to walk, if they are unable to shop, or if they become unusually forgetful, children may need to make adjustments.

¹⁰ Older ones may become confused or depressed. They may start to lose their hearing, sight, or memory, or they may have difficulty using the toilet. If some of these problems appear, medical treatment may help. Visit a doctor as soon as such problems begin. Children may need to take the lead in scheduling visits to the doctor and in other more personal matters. To make sure that parents receive the best possible care, children may need to speak on their behalf, help with paperwork, drive them to appointments, and so on.​—Proverbs 3:27.

11. What can be done to make it easier for parents to adjust to changes?

¹¹ If your parents have health problems that are permanent, you may have to make changes to their care or to the home where they live. The smaller the change, the easier it will probably be for them to adjust. If you live far from your parents, it might be enough for a Witness or a neighbor to visit regularly and let you know how your parents are doing. Do they need help with only cooking and cleaning? Would small changes in the home make it easier and safer for them to move around, bathe, and so on? Maybe a home-care attendant is all that elderly ones need to live on their own. However, if they will not be safe on their own, more permanent assistance will be needed. Whatever the situation, find out what services are available in their area.​—Read Proverbs 21:5.b (See footnote.)

HOW SOME MEET THE CHALLENGE

12, 13. What have some adult children done to honor and care for their parents who live far away?

¹² We want our parents to be safe and comfortable because we love them. It gives us peace of mind knowing that our parents are cared for. However, many adult children do not live near their parents. Some of these children have used vacations to visit their parents to help care for them and to do chores that they are not able to do anymore. Children can show that they love their parents by making regular or daily phone calls, writing letters, or sending e-mails.​—Proverbs 23:24, 25.

¹³ Even if your family live far apart, you will have to decide what daily care is needed for your parents. If you do not live near them and your parents are Witnesses, you can speak with the elders in their congregation and ask for advice. Above all, pray to Jehovah about your parents. (Read Proverbs 11:14.) Even if your parents are not Witnesses, you must “honor your father and your mother.” (Exodus 20:12; Proverbs 23:22) Of course, not all families will make the same decisions. Some decide to have an elderly parent move in with them or move closer to them. However, this is not always possible. Some parents may not want to live with adult children and their families. They may prefer to live on their own and do not want to be a burden to their children. Some may be able to afford home care and prefer that option.​—Ecclesiastes 7:12.

14. What problems may arise for those who do most of the caregiving?

¹⁴ In many families, the son or daughter who lives closest to the parents seems to do most of the caregiving. However, caregivers should be balanced as they care for the needs of their parents and the needs of their own family. There is a limit to each person’s time and energy. And if the caregiver’s situation changes, the family may have to review the current situation. Does one member of the family have too many responsibilities? Could the other children do more, maybe taking turns to provide care?

15. What can be done to prevent a caregiver from burning out?

¹⁵ When an elderly parent needs help all the time, there is a danger that the main caregiver will burn out. (Ecclesiastes 4:6) Loving children want to do all they can, but caring for their parents may become overwhelming. Caregivers who provide this constant care need to be realistic and may need to ask for help. Some assistance from time to time may make it possible to continue providing care without using a nursing home.

16, 17. While caring for aging parents, what feelings may children have? What will help them to understand their feelings and stay balanced? (See also the box “Appreciative Caregiving.”)

¹⁶ It is upsetting to see the painful effects of age on our dear parents. Caregivers sometimes feel sad, anxious, frustrated, angry, guilty, or even resentful. At times, an older parent may say unkind things or be unthankful. If that happens to you, try not to become offended. One mental-health expert says that when we have upsetting feelings, we must first admit that we have them and then try not to feel bad about ourselves for having those feelings. Talk with your husband or wife, another family member, or a trusted friend about these feelings. Such conversations can help you to understand your feelings and stay balanced.

¹⁷ The time may come when it is no longer possible to continue giving a loved one the kind of care he needs at home. The family may decide that a loved one needs to receive care in a nursing home. One Christian sister visited her mother in a nursing home almost every day. She says: “We just could not provide the 24-hour-a-day care that Mommy needed. Accepting nursing-home care for her was not an easy decision to make. Emotionally, it was very, very hard. However, it was the best solution for her in the last months of her life, and she accepted that.”

18. What can caregivers be sure of?

¹⁸ The responsibilities of caring for your aging parents can be complicated and emotionally difficult. When caring for the elderly, there is no set of solutions that will work for everyone. Yet, if you plan carefully, cooperate with your family, communicate well and, most of all, pray to Jehovah, you can fulfill your responsibility to honor your loved ones. When you do this, you can be proud because you are giving them the care and attention they need. (Read 1 Corinthians 13:4-8.) Most important, you will have peace of mind and Jehovah’s blessing.​—Philippians 4:7.

“We get so interested in discussions during the Family Worship evening that it often goes on till late at night if I don’t stop my family,” says a father in Brazil. A father in Japan says that his ten-year-old son does not seem to realize how long they have been studying and wants to continue. Why? The father explains that his son “is motivated, and that contributes to his joy.”

Of course, not all children are excited about family worship. Some do not even enjoy it. Why not? A father in Togo says from experience, “The worship of Jehovah should not be boring.” If family worship is boring, it could mean that changes need to be made to the way it is conducted. Many families have discovered that family worship can be “an exquisite delight,” just as the Sabbath was to some Israelites.​—Isaiah 58:13, 14.

Christian fathers should make sure that their family feels relaxed during family worship. If fathers do this, then the family will enjoy it much more. Ralf, who has three daughters and one son, says that their family worship is more like a conversation than a study. How so? Everyone shares in the discussion. Yet, keeping everyone interested and involved in the study may be difficult at times. One mother admits, “I do not always have the energy to make family worship as enjoyable as I would like it to be.” Can you make your family worship more enjoyable?

FLEXIBILITY AND VARIETY

“We have to be flexible,” says a father of two in Germany. Natalia, a mother of two, says, “The most important thing for our family is variety, variety, variety.” Many families divide their family worship into different parts. Cleiton, a father of two teenagers in Brazil, explains that by doing this, the study becomes much more interesting “and gets all in the family involved.” If there is a big age difference between the children, parents can give attention to the needs of each child by dividing the study time. Also, the parents can be flexible when deciding what publications the family will study and how they will study them.

What are some families doing to have more variety in their family worship? Some start their family worship by singing songs to Jehovah. “It creates a good atmosphere and mentally prepares us for the material at hand,” says Juan in Mexico. His family picks songs that are related to the information that will be studied that evening.

Many families read a section of the Bible together. For variety, each family member reads the part of a different character. In the beginning, this did not feel natural for a father in Japan, who admits that for him it was “a bit unusual to read that way.” But his two boys were happy to see their parents enjoying family worship with them. Some families even act out Bible stories. Roger, a father of two sons in South Africa, says that children “often see things in a Bible account that we as parents have missed.”

Something else that families can do for variety is to work together on a project, such as building a model of Noah’s ark or of Solomon’s temple. Doing research for these projects can be exciting. For example, in Asia a five-year-old girl along with her parents and grandmother tried this. In their living room, they all worked together to make a board game based on the apostle Paul’s missionary tours. Other families have made board games based on stories from the book of Exodus. Variety “brought new life to our family worship and into our family itself,” says 19-year-old Donald in Togo. Can you think of a project that will make your family worship even more enjoyable?

PREPARATION IS NECESSARY

Even though variety and flexibility make family worship interesting, more is needed for all to benefit. Everyone needs to prepare. It may be difficult for children to sit and study for a long time, so a father must carefully select information that will be interesting to the children. Then he must take time to prepare well. One father says, “When I am prepared, everyone has a more meaningful study session.” A father in Germany tells his family what they will study during family worship for the next month. One family with six young children in Benin sometimes watches one of the organization’s DVDs as part of their family worship. How does the family prepare? The father gives them a list of questions ahead of time. Preparation certainly makes a difference in the quality of our family worship.

When the family know ahead of time what will be considered, they can talk about it during the week. Then they will look forward to the study with enthusiasm. And if everyone in the family has an assignment, each one will feel that it is his or her family worship.

STUDY REGULARLY

Many families find it difficult to have their family worship regularly. Why?

Some parents have to work long hours just to feed their families. For example, one father in Mexico leaves home at six o’clock in the morning and does not return until eight o’clock in the evening. Or there may be times when some need to change the day of their family worship because of another spiritual event, such as the circuit overseer’s visit or a district convention.

Despite difficulties, we need to be determined to have family worship regularly. Eleven-year-old Loïs in Togo explains how important this is to her family. “Even though we sometimes have to start our family worship late because of something that has come up during the day, we always have our family worship.” So it is a good idea to schedule your family worship early in the week. Why? Because if something unexpected happens, you can reschedule family worship for later that week.

Why do we call it family worship? Because it is part of our worship to Jehovah. Together as a family, we can offer a sacrifice of “young bulls,” that is, praise to Jehovah. (Hosea 14:2, ftn.) May each one in the family enjoy family worship, because “the joy of Jehovah is your stronghold.”​—Nehemiah 8:9, 10.

Now imagine this: A single mother with two children is invited by a couple in her congregation to spend an evening with them. When she tells her children about the invitation, they are so excited. They can hardly wait for the day to arrive. However, the day before the visit, the couple tell the mother that something unexpected has come up and that they have to cancel the invitation. She later finds out why they canceled. After inviting her, the couple were invited to visit some friends, and they accepted.

As Christians, we should keep our promises. We should never say “‘yes’ and yet ‘no,’” that is, we should never agree to do something and then change our mind without good reason. (2 Corinthians 1:18) However, as the two examples above illustrate, not all situations are the same. There may be times when it seems that we have no choice and we must cancel arrangements we have made. Even the apostle Paul had to do this once.

PAUL WAS ACCUSED OF BEING UNRELIABLE

In the year 55, Paul visited Ephesus on his third missionary tour. He was planning to sail across the Aegean Sea to Corinth and travel from there to Macedonia. Then, on his way back to Jerusalem, he planned to visit the Corinthian congregation a second time, to take their kind gift to the brothers in Jerusalem. (1 Corinthians 16:3) We know this because at 2 Corinthians 1:15, 16, we read: “With this confidence, I was intending to come first to you, so that you might have a second occasion for joy; for I intended to visit you on my way to Macedonia, to return to you from Macedonia, and then to have you send me off to Judea.”

It appears that Paul had written a previous letter to the Corinthian brothers, informing them of his plan to visit them. (1 Corinthians 5:9) A short time after writing that letter, Paul heard from Chloe’s family that there were serious problems in the congregation. (1 Corinthians 1:10, 11) Paul changed his original plan and decided not to visit the Corinthian congregation at that time. He then wrote the letter that we now know as 1 Corinthians. In it Paul gave counsel and correction. He also wrote that he had changed his travel plans and that he would go to Macedonia first and then go to Corinth.​—1 Corinthians 16:5, 6.a (See footnote.)

It seems that when the brothers in Corinth received his letter, some of them accused him of not keeping his promises. They thought that they were better than Paul. He called these ones “superfine apostles.” To defend himself, Paul asked: “Well, when I had such an intention, I did not view the matter lightly, did I? Or do I purpose things in a fleshly way, so that I am saying ‘Yes, yes’ and then ‘No, no’?”​—2 Corinthians 1:17; 11:5.

We might ask, In these circumstances did the apostle Paul really “view the matter lightly”? Of course not! The word translated “lightly” means unreliable and can be used to describe a person who does not keep his promises. Paul’s question “do I purpose things in a fleshly way?” should have helped the Christians in Corinth to see that Paul’s decision to change his plans was not because he was unreliable.

Paul answered their accusation when he wrote: “But God can be relied on that what we say to you is not ‘yes’ and yet ‘no.’” (2 Corinthians 1:18) He changed his travel plans because he wanted the best for his brothers and sisters in Corinth. At 2 Corinthians 1:23, we read Paul’s words: “It is to spare you that I have not yet come to Corinth.” By changing his plans, he gave them a chance to apply his counsel before he visited them. And that is what they did. While he was in Macedonia, Paul heard from Titus that the letter had helped the Corinthians understand that what they were doing was wrong and that they had repented. This gave Paul great joy.​—2 Corinthians 6:11; 7:5-7.

JESUS IS THE GUARANTEE

When the “superfine apostles” accused Paul of not keeping his promises, they might have also been saying that he could not be trusted in his preaching work. However, Paul reminded the Corinthians that he had preached the message of Jesus Christ to them. “The Son of God, Jesus Christ, who was preached among you through us, that is, through me and Silvanus and Timothy, did not become ‘yes’ and yet ‘no,’ but ‘yes’ has become ‘yes’ in his case.” (2 Corinthians 1:19) So was Jesus Christ unreliable in any way? No! Throughout his life and ministry, Jesus always spoke the truth. (John 14:6; 18:37) If what Jesus preached was completely true and reliable and Paul preached the same message, then Paul’s preaching was reliable too.

Jehovah is “the God of truth.” (Psalm 31:5) We see this from what Paul next writes: “No matter how many the promises of God are, they have become ‘yes’ by means of him,” that is, by means of Christ. Because Jesus kept his integrity while on earth, we can be sure that Jehovah’s promises are reliable. Paul continues: “Therefore, also through him [Jesus] is the ‘Amen’ said to God, which brings him glory through us.” (2 Corinthians 1:20) What does it mean that Jesus is the “Amen”? It means that Jesus is the guarantee that all of Jehovah’s promises will come true.

Clearly, then, when Paul said “yes” he really meant “yes.” Like Jesus Christ and Jehovah God, he meant what he said. (2 Corinthians 1:19) He was reliable; he was not someone who made promises “in a fleshly way.” (2 Corinthians 1:17) Instead, he was guided by God’s spirit. (Galatians 5:16) Everything that he did proved that he wanted the best for his brothers and sisters. His Yes meant Yes!

DOES YOUR YES MEAN YES?

Today, it is common for people to make promises and then break them because of a minor problem or because they prefer to do something else. In business matters “yes” does not always mean “yes,” even when an agreement has been signed. Many no longer view marriage as a promise that they have to keep for the rest of their lives despite the difficulties that they may face. The number of people getting divorced is rapidly increasing, and this shows that many view their marriage vow as an unimportant promise that can easily be broken.​—2 Timothy 3:1, 2.

What about you? Does your Yes mean Yes? As we saw at the beginning of this article, it may happen that you have to cancel an appointment, not because you are unreliable, but because of circumstances that you cannot control. But if you make a promise, you really should do all you can to keep it. (Psalm 15:4; Matthew 5:37) If you do this, you will become known as someone who is reliable, a person who always speaks the truth. (Ephesians 4:15, 25; James 5:12) When people realize that you can be trusted in everyday matters, they may be more willing to listen when you talk to them about God’s Kingdom. So we should make sure that our Yes really means Yes!