February 22

Page Two

Problems with in-​laws are common, and they can be heartrending for everyone involved. How can these problems be handled? The following articles should be of help to those who live with their in-​laws, as well as to those who do not.

The Age-​Old In-​Law Conflict

“I CAN’T stand the sight of your face!” Fujiko screamed at her mother-​in-​law, Tomiko. Fujiko was tired of being ordered around. Although she had managed to keep calm on the surface, she was living in anguish. “Within myself I felt bitter,” she says. “I was not myself. I just couldn’t stand living like that every day.”

An old woman living alone in Japan states: “I was abandoned by my son and his wife. Now I don’t have to worry about others, and I live my life as I please, but I do feel lonely when the sun goes down.”

The age-​old conflict between mother-​in-​law and daughter-​in-​law is universal. “Regrettably,” remarks Dulcie Boling, a magazine editor in Australia, “some women will always be jealous of their daughters-​in-​law. . . . There is very little you can do, except grin and bear it.” In the Orient, there are even legends of old women being abandoned in the mountains, an action instigated by their daughters-​in-​law.

Today, this conflict is more complicated than ever. According to statistics, life expectancy is increasing, families are becoming smaller, and the gap between the mortality rates of men and women is widening. What has been the result? As more women live into their 70’s and 80’s, the conflict between mothers and their daughters-​in-​law has become a grueling marathon, not the 100-​yard [100 m] dash it used to be.

What Do the Elderly Want?

Such conflicts notwithstanding, how do aged parents want to be looked after if they have a choice? “Over the last two decades,” say Jacob S. Siegel and Cynthia M. Taeuber, researchers in demography, “both women and men were much less inclined to live with other people if they no longer had a spouse.” Elaine M. Brody, former director of the Department of Human Services, adds that in the United States, “living apart from one’s relatives is the preferred arrangement among the elderly.” Often, their children live nearby, visit, and take care of them.

The Orientals prefer it another way. According to an international survey by the Management and Coordination Agency in Japan, the majority of the elderly in Japan and Thailand want to live with their kin. The survey finds that 61 percent of the elderly in Thailand and 51 percent in Japan actually do so.

Of course, this option is also common in the West. Very old or bedridden parents often do live with their children. In France it is common for those over 75 years of age who survive the death of their mates to live with one of their children.

Accepting the Pros and Cons

When two or three generations decide to live under one roof, there are, of course, certain advantages. The aged feel more secure and less lonely. The younger generation can learn from the experience of the older ones, and there are economic benefits as well.

On the other hand, living together can snarl an already entangled in-​law relationship. In Japan, for example, where aged parents have traditionally lived with the eldest son and his family, the conflict between mothers and daughters-​in-​law is proverbial.

If you are faced with such a situation, what can you do? In his book America’s Older Population, Paul E. Zopf, Jr., professor of sociology at Guilford College, says: “The family also generates conflict and the opportunity for conflict management. The ability to control conflict and to interact productively with elderly members may be a skill that carries over into other relationships.”

So take a positive view of the matter. If you learn to control family conflicts, you will probably become more skillful at managing other thorny situations as well. Accept it as a challenge, and you will be a better person for it. Let us examine the problems of living with in-​laws and see how such problems can be dealt with successfully. And even if you are not presently living under such an arrangement, you can still benefit from considering the principles involved.

[Box on page 4]

More Parents Than Children

Now, for the first time in history, according to demographer Samuel Preston, the average married couple has more parents than children. The issue facing many of today’s couples is how to balance their responsibilities to look after two sets of parents.

What Causes the Problem?

“TOO much salt is not good for the family!” declares the mother. “But the food is so bland and tasteless!” insists the daughter-​in-​law. She drops in a pinch of salt when the mother’s back is turned.

With each trying to have her way, both end up eating a dish that neither one of them enjoys. But the consequences may be far more serious than that. In-law friction may lead to mental and emotional struggles that last for years.

To many, this kind of conflict seems unavoidable. “However well a family seems to be getting along together, there is bound to be friction between a mother and her daughter-​in-​law,” writes Dr. Shigeta Saito, chairman of the Japan Mental Hospital Association. But the problem is not limited to the Orient.

Awake! correspondent in Italy reports that “the custom of getting married and moving in to live with the parents of either the bride or the groom has caused problems in many families, and many a young wife suffers because of the often meddlesome and authoritarian attitude of her mother-​in-​law.”

In the countries of both East and West, newspapers and magazines abound with personal-​advice columns dealing with in-​law conflicts. What, then, may cause the problems?

Who Makes the Decisions?

When two women share a kitchen, the issue often is: Who makes the decisions? “Our tastes and methods differ, and I was flustered every time a disagreement arose,” says a woman who has lived with her mother-​in-​law for more than 12 years.

“For the first ten years, we confronted each other on trivia,” admits another daughter-​in-​law. Disagreements may rise over things as insignificant as how to hang shirts on the clothesline. Even if the women do not live in the same house, the situation may be troublesome. A visiting mother-​in-​law who makes such comments as, “My son doesn’t like his steak done that way,” may result in lifelong hard feelings. It all comes down to who makes what decisions and for whom.

Pointing to this issue, Takako Sodei, assistant professor of homemaking at Ochanomizu Women’s University says: “Whether one lives with a son and daughter-​in-​law or a daughter and son-​in-​law, it is impossible for a household to support two wives competing with each other for control. It is necessary to have separate living space or adjust the situation and let one be the homemaker and the other a subhomemaker.” The two generations must come to a reasonable agreement based on the physical and mental condition of the older and the experience, or lack of experience, of the younger.

The Matter of Privacy

When two or more generations live in the same quarters, family members must sacrifice their privacy to some extent. In this, however, each member is likely to have a different yardstick. A young couple may yearn for more privacy, while the elderly may thirst for more companionship.

For example, a daughter-​in-​law living near Tokyo felt that her mother-​in-​law invaded the couple’s privacy. How so? By taking in the personal laundry of her and her husband, folding it, and putting it away. She did not consider it proper for her mother-​in-​law to do these personal things for them. On the other hand, her mother-​in-​law, Tokiko, became distressed when her daughter-​in-​law, in tidying up the house, discarded items that Tokiko had cherished for years.

Invasion of privacy can become extreme. Tom and his wife, who took care of Tom’s elderly mother, were disturbed by her excursions into their bedroom in the middle of the night. Her reason? “I wanted to see if Tom was all right,” said the mother. The problem was not solved until they moved into a two-​story apartment and the mother was forbidden to come upstairs.

In many families, though, it is when the third generation comes along that problems really intensify.

Dealing With Children

Nowadays, it is common for a young mother to consult various books for advice on child care. On the other hand, grandmother, with her years of experience in child training, naturally feels that she is the one qualified to give advice. That advice, however, is often viewed as criticism, and conflict results.

Takako had to deal with this problem when she disciplined her young son. Her husband’s mother and grandmother rushed into her room to stop her, shouting even louder than the crying baby. Feeling intimidated, Takako stopped disciplining her son. Later, realizing the importance of providing discipline, she decided to resume such training.​—Proverbs 23:13; Hebrews 12:11.

A mother who lives in Yokohama also struggled with her mother-​in-​law after the children were born. The mother was annoyed that grandmother gave the children snacks between meals so that they were too full to eat their meals.

Commenting on this problem, Dr. Saito says: “[Grandparents] give sweets and allowances to their grandchildren. They indulge the selfish wishes of the young. In short, they spoil their grandchildren endlessly.” He advises that young mothers make it clear that they will make no concessions on child training.

Vying for Affection

In this conflict between mothers-​in-​law and daughters-​in-​law, there is something quite irrational at work. “Psychologically speaking,” explains Dr. Saito, “the mother feels that her daughter-​in-​law has snatched her son away from her. Of course, she does not orally express such a thought, as that is too childish. But, subconsciously, the thought of being robbed of her son’s affection is deeply rooted in her.” The result is a strained relationship, if not outright rivalry between the two of them.

This tendency seems to intensify as the size of families decreases. With fewer children to care for, the mother feels closer to her son. After years of living with her son, she is well aware of his likes and dislikes. Though the new bride is anxious to please her husband, she lacks this intimate knowledge, at least at first. A competitive spirit may therefore easily develop, with mother and daughter-​in-​law vying for the affections of the same man.

A Tragic Shift

In the old days in Japan under Confucian philosophy, when such family conflicts occurred, the daughter-​in-​law was sent away​—divorced. And that was the end of the matter. Today, however, it is a different situation.

Since World War II, the younger generation has taken control of the family purse, and the older generation is losing its influence and authority. Gradually, the situation has reversed. Now elderly parents are being abandoned in hospitals and institutions. How tragic to see this plight in a society where respect for the elderly used to be the norm!

How can the tendency to dump the elderly be reversed? Is there any way for two women to coexist peacefully under the same roof?

[Picture on page 7]

Reasonable agreement must be reached as to who makes the decisions

Enjoying a Warm In-​Law Relationship

FUJIKO, the anguished daughter-​in-​law mentioned in the opening article, finally pursuaded her husband to move out of his parents’ apartment and into one next door. But things did not improve much. Interference by her in-​laws continued, and her gloom lingered on. Then one day a stranger called on her.

That visit started Fujiko on a course that resulted in a changed personality, and this improved her relationship with others. She began to study the Bible with Jehovah’s Witnesses. In time, her attitude changed so much that her father-​in-​law wanted to attend the studies to see for himself ‘what kind of religion it was that had so changed her personality.’

Recognizing the New Bond

The Bible gives a clear picture of the Scriptural marriage arrangement. After God created the first human pair and brought them together, he established the following principle: “A man will leave his father and his mother and he must stick to his wife and they must become one flesh.” (Genesis 2:24) So the new couple must recognize that they have entered into a new bond. They must now stick to each other as an independent unit even though they may live with their in-​laws.

Leaving father and mother, however, does not mean that children when they get married can turn their backs on their parents and that they no longer need to respect and honor them. “Do not despise your mother just because she has grown old,” admonishes the Bible. (Proverbs 23:22) Yet, with marriage, there is an adjustment in relationships. As long as each member of the family keeps this well in mind, the young couple can benefit from the experience and the wisdom of the parents.

Timothy, the reputable young man whom the apostle Paul took on his missionary journeys, was brought up by his Jewish mother, Eunice. However, his grandmother Lois evidently also had a hand in shaping his life. (2 Timothy 1:5; 3:15) This is not to say that grandmothers have the right to interfere in child training and set up standards different from those of the parents. There is an appropriate manner in which the older generation can help the younger in training children.​—Titus 2:3-5.

“The Truly Wise Woman”

If two generations are to cooperate in such a sensitive issue as child training, both must act in wisdom. “The truly wise woman has built up her house,” says a Bible proverb, “but the foolish one tears it down with her own hands.” (Proverbs 14:1) How can a woman build up her house? Tomiko says that it was communication that helped her to mend her relationship with her daughter-​in-​law, Fujiko. “There is a frustrating of plans where there is no confidential talk,” counsels the Bible.​—Proverbs 15:22.

Communication does not mean blurting out everything on your mind without regard for the feelings of others. Here is where wisdom comes into play. “A wise person will listen” to what others have to say. Sometimes your in-​laws may have something to say, but they hesitate to express themselves. Be discerning, and ‘draw their thoughts up.’ Then ‘meditate’ before you speak.​—Proverbs 1:5; 15:28; 20:5.

Timing is very important. “As apples of gold in silver carvings is a word spoken at the right time for it,” says a Bible proverb. (Proverbs 25:11) Tokiko and her daughter-​in-​law say that they wait till the right time before they express opinions that may rub the other the wrong way. “I try to think before talking when I want to point out something to my daughter-​in-​law,” says Tokiko. “I keep the points in my mind and speak when she is in a good mood and is not hungry. You see, it is easy to get irritated when you are hungry.”

A wise woman will refrain from speaking ill of her in-​laws. “Whether we are mothers-​in-​law or daughters-​in-​law, we should be aware that whatever ill we speak of the other party, it will eventually be known to them,” says Sumie Tanaka, a Japanese writer who lived with her mother-​in-​law for 30 years. Rather, she advocates speaking well of in-​laws directly and indirectly.

What, though, if your in-​laws do not respond to your efforts?

Be Forgiving

Serious problems between in-​laws often result from things that would cause no problem if they were done or said by someone else. Since all of us are imperfect and “stumble in word,” at times we may ‘speak thoughtlessly as with the stabs of a sword.’ (James 3:2; Proverbs 12:18) Yet, it is wise not to get upset at every thoughtless word.

Those who have overcome in-​law problems have heeded the Bible counsel: “Continue putting up with one another and forgiving one another freely if anyone has a cause for complaint against another.” (Colossians 3:13) True, it may not be easy to put up with your in-​laws and forgive them, especially when there is a cause for complaint. But a strong incentive for doing so is the assurance that we will thereby receive forgiveness from God himself for our mistakes.​—Matthew 6:14, 15.

Even in Oriental lands, where people traditionally follow Buddhism, Taoism, Confucianism, and Shinto, there are many who have studied the Bible and have come to appreciate the truth about the benevolent Creator. Such appreciation has helped them to overcome seemingly insurmountable feelings of bitterness.

“Love Never Fails”

A happy in-​law relationship needs a sure foundation. Helping an aged or sick in-​law out of a sense of obligation does not always make for the best relationship. Haruko learned this when her mother-​in-​law was dying of cancer. She spent most of her day in the hospital caring for her mother-​in-​law, and in addition, she took care of her own family. She was under so much stress that she eventually lost most of her hair.

One day while tending her mother-​in-​law’s nails, she unintentionally cut one to the quick. “You don’t really care about me!” snapped the mother-​in-​law.

Shocked by those unappreciative words, Haruko could not hold back her tears. Then she realized that the words hurt so much because she had been doing everything for her mother-​in-​law out of a sense of obligation. She decided to let the motivating force for her service be that of love. (Ephesians 5:1, 2) This enabled her to overcome her hurt feelings and resulted in a restored relationship with her mother-​in-​law until she died.

Indeed, love as defined in the Bible is the key to quieting family discord. Read what the apostle Paul said about it, and see if you do not agree. “Love is long-​suffering and kind,” he wrote. “Love is not jealous, it does not brag, does not get puffed up, does not behave indecently, does not look for its own interests, does not become provoked. It does not keep account of the injury. It does not rejoice over unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.” No wonder Paul added: “Love never fails.” (1 Corinthians 13:4-8) How can you cultivate such love?

The Bible lists “love” as part of “the fruitage” of God’s spirit. (Galatians 5:22, 23) Thus, in addition to your own efforts, it is essential to have the spirit of God if you are to cultivate this kind of love. Further, you can ask Jehovah, the God of the Bible, to help you to add love like his to your personality. (1 John 4:8) All of this, of course, requires that you learn about him by studying his Word, the Bible. Jehovah’s Witnesses will be most happy to assist you, as they did Fujiko and many others.

As you apply what you learn from the Bible, you will find that not only will your relationship with God improve but so will your relationship with everyone around you, including your in-​laws. You will experience what the Bible promises, namely, “the peace of God that excels all thought.”​—Philippians 4:6, 7.

Fujiko and others mentioned in these articles came to enjoy such peace​—and so can you. Yes, by looking to Jehovah God and following the counsel of his Word, the Bible, you too can build and maintain a warm relationship with your in-​laws.

[Box on page 8, 9]

The Husband​—Peacemaker or Peacebreaker?

When two or three generations live under one roof, the role of the husband in maintaining family peace is not to be ignored. Concerning the typical husband who evades his responsibility, Professor Tohru Arichi of Kyushu University, a specialist in family sociology, writes:

“When the couple lives with [the mother], the mother senses the needs of her son, and she unintentionally cares for her son when she perceives such needs. The son accepts such care without any hesitation. If the son would think a little more of his wife’s situation and put his mother in her place concerning her intervention, the problem would be solved. Sadly and too often, the son does not realize that.”

How, then, can a husband take an active role in making peace in his family? Mitsuharu says that his applying Bible principles helped his family. “The bond between a mother and her son is very strong even though he has grown up to be an adult,” he admits, “so the son must make conscious effort to ‘leave his father and his mother and stick to his wife.’” He applied the principle by discussing matters concerning child care and training only with his wife, and he did not compare his wife to his mother when it came to housework. “Now,” he continues, “we and my parents respect one another. Each of us knows where intervention will be resented and where help and cooperation will be appreciated.”

In addition to ‘sticking to his wife,’ the husband must be a mediator between his mother and his wife. (Genesis 2:24) He needs to be a good listener and to let them pour out their hearts. (Proverbs 20:5) One husband, who has learned to handle situations tactfully, first finds out how his wife feels. Then, in the presence of his wife, he talks to his mother about the issues involved. By thus assuming his role as the peacemaker, a son can help create pleasant relations in the home between the two women he loves.

[Picture on page 9]

Have hearing ears and communicate

[Picture on page 10]

Love, not a feeling of obligation, builds up fine relationships

The West African Weaver at Work

By Awake! correspondent in Liberia

IN THIS sophisticated 20th century, with its computerized, mass-​production factories, how refreshing it is to observe a craftsman producing beautiful work in much the same way as it was done in Bible times.

One day while visiting Mustapha, I found him at work on his loom. In former times, weaving was a secret art, so according to local tradition, no one could stand behind a weaver to watch him work. Mustapha explained that among the Mende tribe, weavers at one time all belonged to one family within a chiefdom. Even then, only a few persons actually knew the process, and only paramount chiefs were able to afford the services of a weaver.

When a paramount chief employed a weaver, a clearing was made in the forest nearby, and a fence of palm thatch was built to enclose the weaving area. It was a common belief that a spirit aided the weaver in the intricate process of designing the cloth, so the enclosure prevented anyone from entering without warning to the weaver.

The weaver would be employed by the paramount chief to produce a gbalee, which consisted of several strips sewn together to make a piece somewhat larger than a bedspread. The weaver and his family, along with an assistant, would go to stay at the chief’s compound, where they were provided with a hut and daily food. The weaver would not hurry unduly and might take as long as a year to complete two gbalees. When a government official or other dignitary visited, the gbalee would be presented to him as a gift. The weaver would not be paid for his work with money but might be given a cow or a virgin girl.

However, modern weavers, like Mustapha, operate on a commercial basis. Mustapha even had a contract to provide the furnishings for the Organization of African Unity Conference Hall in Monrovia. With the development of the tourist trade, there is a growing market for gowns, shirts, bedspreads, place mats, and other woven goods.

Source of the Basic Materials

The basic materials, I learned, are all obtainable locally. The threads are made from cotton. There are basically two types, low bush (white) and high bush (brown). The cotton is then separated according to color​—brown, light brown, and white—​and placed in kinjas (storage baskets).

I was invited to visit an old woman, Siah, to observe the processes by which the cotton is prepared for the weaver. She took great pride in demonstrating her skills.

The first step is to remove the seeds from the cotton. To do this, cotton is placed on a wooden block, and a round stick or piece of iron is passed over it in a rolling motion. In this way the seeds are pressed out of the cotton. Then the pieces of seeded fiber are put in baskets awaiting the next process, which is carding.

This process is fascinating to watch. Cotton fiber is folded over the string of a bow, which is plucked repeatedly to loosen the cotton. Eventually the cotton becomes fluffy. Then pieces the size of the palm of the hand are pulled off, patted flat, and placed in loose layers in baskets, ready for spinning.

The next process, spinning, is done mostly by women. This calls to mind the Bible’s commendation of a capable wife: “Her hands she has thrust out to the distaff, and her own hands take hold of the spindle.” (Proverbs 31:19) This accurately describes the method still used today, as demonstrated by Siah.

First, she winds the carded cotton loosely around a smooth stick, the distaff. Holding the distaff high in her left hand, she draws the fibers down with her right hand, at the same time twisting them to form the coarse thread. The thread is attached to a spindle, and it is further twisted by the rapidly spinning spindle.

Since the cotton is basically white or brown, I wondered how the vivid colors are obtained. Well, a bright red dye is obtained by boiling the bark of the camwood tree. Yellow dye comes from the turmeric plant. A root is processed in the same way to make a brown dye. Wood ash is added to make the colors fast.

A brilliant blue is obtained from the tender young leaves of the indigo plant. The leaves are crushed underfoot on a mat, and then they are sun dried for three or four days. Afterward, they are loosely packed in storage baskets and hung under the eaves of the house. Later the dyestuffs are taken from these containers and mixed with water. They are then kept in big, covered clay pots, which can be seen standing or sunk into the ground in the courtyard or behind the house. The yarn is dipped in the dye for about a day at a time, and various shades are produced according to the number of times it is dipped.

The art of weaving has been used for centuries to produce a variety of articles that enhance our enjoyment of life. Learning firsthand some details about the process indeed proved fascinating to me.

Sudden Destruction!​—How Have They Coped?

WHEN Hurricane Hugo swept over Guadeloupe on Saturday, September 16, 1989, the night seemed endless. “A NIGHT OF NIGHTMARE” it was called. Next, Montserrat was terrorized by the 140 mile-​per-​hour [230 km/​hr] winds. More than 20 died on these Caribbean islands.

Continuing its assault, Hugo mauled the Leeward Islands of St. Kitts and Nevis. The next night it brutalized the U.S. Virgin Islands of St. Croix and St. Thomas. The destruction left behind on St. Croix was almost beyond belief. Moving on, about noon Monday the hurricane flattened the northeastern part of Puerto Rico, especially devastating the tiny offshore islands of Vieques and Culebra.

Renewing its strength over water, Hugo gathered itself for yet another nighttime assault. Near midnight Thursday, packing winds of 135 miles an hour [220 km/​hr], the huge storm slammed into the South Carolina coast of the United States. It cut a swath of destruction more than a hundred miles [160 km] wide from south of Charleston to beyond Myrtle Beach. Its destructive punch was maintained inland for over 200 miles [320 km], clipping power poles and downing huge oak trees as far away as Charlotte, North Carolina.

Hundreds of thousands fled coastal areas and thus survived when winds and 17-​foot [5 m] waves swept away many houses and destroyed hundreds of others. Literally tens of thousands of homes and other buildings were damaged.

The destruction had to be seen to be believed​—boats stacked like toys up to six high, sand deposited to a depth of three feet [1 m] in streets, huge trees on top of houses, roofs with gaping holes as if clawed open by a giant hand. ‘My son raises roosters to sell,’ reported one woman. ‘He staked them all down so they wouldn’t get blown away, and mostly they didn’t. But they haven’t got a feather on them.’

Yet, because warnings were heeded, only about 26 people in the United States died during the storm, and a few more than that in the Caribbean. On the other hand, economic losses are gigantic, running into many thousands of millions of dollars. U.S. government legislation following the storm provided for an initial $1.1 thousand million in emergency aid for Hugo victims, the largest such disaster-​relief bill ever approved. That record, however, was soon eclipsed.

A More Sudden Destruction

On October 17, a month after Hugo touched land, northern California was shaken by an earthquake measuring 7.1 on the Richter scale. Bridges crashed, buildings toppled, and thousands either ran screaming from their homes or were paralyzed with fear as the ground rolled and shook for 15 or more seconds. More than a hundred thousand homes were damaged, and from several hundred to a thousand were destroyed. A week after the quake, some ten thousand residents of Santa Cruz County were still unable to drive to their homes because of landslides that blocked roads.

Death and destruction would have been much greater had builders not adhered to codes mandating quake-​resistant construction. The 1988 quake in Armenia, for example, was less powerful but killed 25,000. Yet, apparently fewer than 70 died in the California quake, many of them when the upper roadway of a mile-​long section of highway Interstate 880 collapsed onto cars on the lower roadway.

Never in U.S. history has a natural disaster been so costly. The following week, government legislation provided for over three thousand million dollars in relief. However, much more will be needed to rebuild. The president of the Personal Insurance Federation of California said that a total damage estimate for the earthquake of ten thousand million dollars “would be reasonable.”

Reminder of Basic Needs

A man was in his yard in a residential section of Charleston a couple of days after Hugo struck. As a relief worker was riding by, the man asked: “Do you have a glass of water?” For a moment it didn’t dawn on the worker that people didn’t even have water to drink!

Over 1,900 years ago, the apostle Peter pointed to a basic need of those in such trying circumstances. “The end of all things has drawn close,” he said. “Above all things, have intense love for one another.” (1 Peter 4:7, 8) The end of the entire Jewish system of things was near when Peter wrote those words. The end came a few years later, in 70 C.E., when Roman armies devastated Jerusalem. However, Christians had been given a sign in advance, and they heeded it and fled to the mountains across the Jordan River near the town of Pella.​—Luke 21:20-22.

Try to imagine the situation as perhaps thousands of Christians arrived in that mountainous area. They evidently didn’t have housing or other basic needs but had to set up makeshift shelters. There were shortages and hardships. (Matthew 24:16-20) What did they particularly need at that trying time? “Intense love for one another,” Peter said. Yes, helping one another to cope.

Was such a spirit of helpfulness and love manifested following the recent devastations caused by Hugo and the earthquake?

Coping With Hugo’s Destruction

On St. Croix, survivors of Hugo greeted one another with hugs of joy and relief, just happy to be alive. Soon massive relief efforts were underway, providing victims shelter and food. However, some sought to profit from the misfortune of victims. Profiteers charged exorbitant prices. For example, a bag of ice that ordinarily was 79 cents sold for $10. There was even looting. But generally such callous acts were overshadowed by many acts of human kindness and compassion. Particularly noteworthy were reports regarding the relief efforts of Jehovah’s Witnesses.

Even before Hugo struck, Christian elders visited those living in less secure houses and urged them to move into more strongly built Kingdom Halls or into the safer houses of their Christian brothers. The Kingdom Hall in Summerville, South Carolina, had more than 50 persons staying in it overnight during the storm!

In Guadeloupe such preparations for the storm proved lifesaving. On that island alone, 117 houses of Witnesses were destroyed, while nearly 300 houses of other Witnesses were severely damaged. In addition, 8 Kingdom Halls were badly damaged, while 14 others were less severely damaged.

Although several Witnesses were injured, none were killed, either in Guadeloupe or anywhere else in the Caribbean. The grown son of one of the Witnesses, however, was killed when he was literally sucked up by the wind that suddenly blew the roof off the house.

Not until the third day after the storm were fellow Witnesses finally able to make telephone contact with their brothers in Guadeloupe. In the meantime, however, traveling overseers and branch office personnel on the island met to organize a survey of the needs of their brothers, that is, their fellow Witnesses.

Soon water, food, clothing, and other necessities were being generously donated by those less seriously affected. Water was available at the branch office, and it was heartwarming to see brothers bring in all available containers, fill them, and then distribute them to those in need. Witnesses in Martinique were among the first from other countries to respond to the needs of their brothers in Guadeloupe.

Since Guadeloupe is under French control, Jehovah’s Witnesses in France quickly airfreighted to the island heavy plastic sheeting, nylon rope, and plastic cans for water. Shortly, some 100 metric tons of building supplies were shipped to Guadeloupe and immediately distributed.

Right away, Witnesses in Puerto Rico also began organizing a relief program. By the weekend after the storm, hundreds from unaffected areas of the island were descending on devastated towns to help repair houses. Also, two boats loaded with food, materials, and about 40 Witnesses sailed over to the small island of Culebra. The radio station there was soon praising the rebuilding work being done. The following weekend 112 Witnesses, accompanied by six tons of building materials, sailed to the little island of Vieques for similar reconstruction work.

Not until Friday, five days after the storm, were brothers from Puerto Rico able to rent a cargo plane and take food and medicine to St. Croix. One of the brothers reports: “From the air the whole island looked like a garbage dump. Entire villages were smashed and twisted. All over the hills were pieces of wood, metal, and debris; nothing green, just brown stumps of trees and burned grass, seared by wind gusts of up to 200 miles per hour [320 km/​hr].”

After ascertaining the extent of the damage, Witnesses shipped in some 75 tons of building supplies. During October, about a hundred volunteers from Puerto Rico helped the brothers on St. Croix rebuild. A Kingdom Hall served as a dormitory. Each day was begun with a discussion of a Bible text, just as is done at all branch offices of Jehovah’s Witnesses. Local Christian sisters washed, cleaned, and cooked for the brothers.

Sheila Williams had saved for years to build a new home, and she had just moved into it when Hugo destroyed it. When she heard that her Christian brothers were coming from Puerto Rico to help victims, she told her workmates. But they said: “They will not do anything for you. You are black, not Spanish like them.” What a surprise they received when Sheila soon had a completely new house!

A five-​year-​old in Michigan, U.S.A., having seen news reports of the devastation on St. Croix, wanted to help those who had lost their possessions. She asked her mother’s permission to give a dress to a little girl so that ‘she can look nice when she goes to the Kingdom Hall.’

“To my surprise,” the mother noted, “she selected one of her best dresses.” The dress was sent, and as you can see on page 18, a child on St. Croix is delighted to have it.

After Hugo swept through South Carolina Friday morning, September 22, a relief committee was immediately formed. Christian elders in each of the scores of congregations in the affected areas were contacted, and these, in turn, accounted for every member of their congregation. Happily, nobody had been injured or killed, although the homes of some Witnesses were destroyed and those of others were badly damaged. One Kingdom Hall was severely damaged, and others also suffered some damage.

Things looked especially bleak in and around Charleston, with thousands of trees down, hundreds of roofs leaking, houses destroyed or torn apart, no drinking water, no electricity, no refrigeration, and no gasoline available. The picture, however, changed quickly.

Many brothers from the Charleston area had gathered together Saturday morning, the day after the storm, awaiting help. Ron Edling, the city overseer, describes what happened when word finally filtered in that Witnesses from outlying areas were on the way. “When we went outside, we saw one of the most beautiful sights we had ever seen. There was a convoy, and in the front window of the lead truck and the following trucks was a sign that read ‘JW Hurricane Relief Crews.’

“There were pickup trucks, cars, pickup trucks pulling trailers, and along with them thousands of gallons of water. They brought chain saws, and 300 gallons [1,100 L] of gasoline to power them. It was a sight that I’ll never forget. At that moment I thought, ‘This is one of the finest moments I have ever experienced in God’s organization.’ Those brothers not only brought critically needed supplies but also brought hope. I’m sure that everybody realized then what a brotherhood we have. Though it might take a little while, we were going to dig ourselves out.”

The following weekend as many as 400 Witness relief workers were on hand. Altogether, work was done on the roofs or in the yards of about 800 families, including many who are not Witnesses. At one relief center, the brothers were feeding almost 3,000 persons daily. In all, the Witnesses received and distributed over 500,000 pounds [230,000 kg] of food and 171,000 pounds [78,000 kg] of clothing, not to mention much building material and many other items. By Sunday, October 8, just 16 days after Hugo hit, all Kingdom Halls were repaired to the extent that all congregations could resume their regular schedule of meetings.

Coping With the California Quake

The epicenter of the October 17 earthquake was some 70 miles [110 km] south of San Francisco, about 10 miles [16 km] northeast of Santa Cruz. In this heavily populated area, where brief earth tremors are not uncommon, millions were terrified by what seemed an endless shaking of 15 seconds or more.

“The building literally rocked back and forth,” said Ray Vaden, a Christian elder in San Jose. “I wondered if it was going to remain standing. As I looked out my window, I could see that the roads were jammed with rush-​hour traffic. It was 5:04 p.m.

“Finally we were able to start contacting the brothers in our congregation. Those we couldn’t reach by phone we arranged to visit in their homes. This took several hours because of traffic congestion. By 8:30 p.m. we learned that none were injured, although there was breakage of items inside many houses. The next day we learned that the homes of some of our brothers in the area were so severely damaged that they had to move out. They were taken into the homes of fellow Witnesses.”

Near Los Gatos, a Christian sister was taking a bath on the second floor of her two-​story house when the entire first floor collapsed. So she stepped out of the bathtub on the first-floor level, amazingly uninjured. Had she been on the first floor, she would surely have been killed.

Right away, friends wanted to know what they could do for victims. On Thursday, two days after the earthquake, a committee to care for these was set up. On Saturday, large vans and other vehicles delivered tents, sleeping bags, lanterns and stoves, clothing, flashlights, canned food, drinking water, and so forth, to those in need. That morning alone, $41,000 was donated to the relief fund!

What a contrast to the attitude that some people of the world manifested! A man crawled to a victim trapped in her car beneath the collapsed section of Interstate 880. He promised not to hurt her but then took her rings, jewelry, and purse, and fled without helping her. Altogether more than 40 died in the roadway collapse, among them Mary Washington, one of Jehovah’s Witnesses.

The Regional Building Committee of Jehovah’s Witnesses soon began to assess damages. Two Kingdom Halls suffered minor damage. However, the homes of several Witnesses were so badly damaged that they needed to be destroyed. The work crews were able to put a number of trailers back on their foundations and to repair many of the brothers’ homes and to rebuild others. Hundreds of thousands of dollars have been donated to carry on this work.

As the end of this system draws closer, in fulfillment of Jesus’ prophecy, we can expect more earthquakes and other disasters. (Matthew 24:3-8) There will be hardships no doubt even more severe than those experienced by early Christians when Jerusalem was destroyed. The Bible prophecy has even greater force in our day: “The end of all things has drawn close.” Therefore, what is needed? “Above all things, have intense love for one another.” (1 Peter 4:7, 8) Surely it warms our hearts to see such love being demonstrated among the brotherhood of Jehovah’s Witnesses!

[Maps on page 15]

(For fully formatted text, see publication)

CALIFORNIA

Oakland

San Francisco

Los Gatos

Santa Cruz

[Map](For fully formatted text, see publication)

U.S.A.

Charleston

Atlantic Ocean

Puerto Rico

Guadeloupe

[Pictures on page 16, 17]

Right: Hugo’s destruction on the South Carolina coast]

[Credit Line]

Maxie Roberts/​Courtesy of THE STATE

Below: Cars piled up in front of a high school

[Credit Line]

Maxie Roberts/​Courtesy of THE STATE

Bottom: Relief crew of Jehovah’s Witnesses helping in the cleanup and restoration

[Pictures on page 18]

Left: A St. Croix child wearing dress sent by a five-​year-​old in Michigan who wanted to help

Below: Jehovah’s Witnesses in Guadeloupe sorting donated food

Lower left: Sheila Williams with relief worker who helped rebuild her house that was destroyed

[Pictures on page 21]

Above: The upper roadway of Interstate 880 collapsed onto the lower roadway

Left: Raim Manor on second floor of her house, which ended up at first-floor level

Learning From the Jarawas

By Awake! correspondent in India

“YOUR blood pressure is too high, and your nerves are a wreck. Take a trip to a tropical island and relax!” If you are keyed up under the tensions and pressures of modern civilization, this might be just the advice you need. Even if not for medical reasons, who can resist such a tempting suggestion? So why not get away from it all by visiting the Andaman Islands, home of the Jarawas?

Andaman Islands? Jarawas? Don’t be embarrassed if you have never heard of them, for they are far off the beaten track of world tourism. If you look at a map, you will find the Andaman Islands in the Bay of Bengal, between India and Myanmar (formerly Burma). This archipelago, made up of some 300 islands, is now the land’s end of the Republic of India.

An Uncivilized People?

The islands are the home of four Negrito tribes​—the Great Andamanese, the Jarawas, the Sentinelese, and the Onges. The Negritos, meaning “little negroes,” are thought to be remnants of an ancient, dark-​skinned, pygmy race that once inhabited most of Southeast Asia and Oceania. Because of their isolation, they have been called the purest remnants of “Stone Age man,” or, as Lieutenant Colebrook of the British Army, which once controlled the islands, put it, “the least civilised in the world.”

In 1858 when the British established a penal colony there, the Great Andamanese numbered in the thousands. Soon, the outsiders’ diseases​—measles, syphilis, and others—​along with opium addiction and alcoholism, devastated the tribesmen. Now only a few of them, all of mixed blood, remain on tiny Strait Island. The Onges suffered a similar fate.

For years the Jarawas and the Sentinelese resisted contact with, and exploitation by, outsiders. Their hostility succeeded in keeping them in isolation but also earned them the reputation of being uncivilized and bloodthirsty cannibals. Only a relatively few years ago, when officers of the anthropological department in Port Blair, the capital of the Andaman Islands, tried to contact one of the tribal groups on North Sentinel Island, their launch was met with a shower of arrows, one piercing the leg of a photographer.

What made them so hostile? M. V. Portman, a British officer administering the islands at the end of the last century, remarked: “On our arrival the Jarawas were quiet and inoffensive towards us, nor did they ever disturb us, until we took to continuously molesting them by inciting the coastal Andamanese against them. After a few years of this disturbance, the life of the Jarawas became very hard and in retaliation they began to attack us. It was our fault if the Jarawas became hostile.”

The Jarawa Way of Life

The Jarawas are seminomadic. They live in groups of about 30, and a number of neighboring groups make up a tribe. Each group moves about within a well-​defined boundary and does not trespass the territory of other groups. Living in a lush, tropical environment, they have no agriculture and maintain no domestic animals. Their livelihood depends on their bows, arrows, and spears​—hunting and fishing.

It is part of their way of life that food is shared in common. So if someone in the group catches a turtle, everyone has turtle. If one catches a pig, everyone has pig. In their social order, there are no class distinctions with haves and have-​nots. “The Jarawas could never be considered poor,” said one of the anthropological officers. “They have all their want in abundance.”

An unusual thing about the Jarawas is that they are among the few peoples around the world who do not know how to start a fire. They get their fire from burning forests ignited by lightning during the frequent thunderstorms. And they guard their fires carefully, keeping them burning and even carrying them along when they move.

A bane of modern civilization is the breakdown in moral values. “Among the Jarawas, there is no premarital sex,” said the officer quoted above. “Adultery is very rare. A guilty one would face strong social disapproval. He would feel so bad he would leave the community for some length of time before he would feel like returning.” Do people living in your “civilized” community have such a keen sense of morality?

Modern civilization is synonymous with high blood pressure, heart disease, cancer, and the like. The Jarawas are not plagued with such illnesses. Though small in stature​—the men being not over five feet [1.5 m] tall and the women even shorter—​they have been called “the most perfectly formed little beings in existence.” In their own environment, they seldom fall ill.

Though religion is not prominent in their lives, the Jarawas do have certain rituals regarding the dead. When someone dies, the body is buried, and the hut formerly occupied by the deceased is abandoned. After some months, the body is exhumed. The skull, or more often the lower jaw, is then worn by the next of kin. After some time, other relatives wear it in turn. This practice is considered a mark of respect for the dead one and is clearly connected with their ideas about the dead. The Jarawas believe that there is a soul, a carrier of life, that lives on in another world. They also believe that the soul still takes an interest in them, so they will not do anything that may annoy it.

A Home of Plenty

The Jarawas enjoy a home richly endowed. Among the many beautiful plants dressing the islands are the glorious orchids, some of them found only in these islands. In 1880, according to regional botanist Dr. N. P. Balakrishnan, some varieties of these orchids “like rare diamonds” were fetching “fabulous prices in England.”

Recently found on Sentinel Island by a German scientist, at the cost of a finger, is the robber crab. The Government Fisheries Department Exhibition at Port Blair, Andaman Islands, has had a display board description of the robber crab that claims: ‘Dangerous to coconut plantations. Climbs coconut trees. Plucks ripe fruit. Breaks open the shell with its formidable claws. Drinks the sweet water and eats the coconut flesh.’ Others, however, have questioned that this crab actually does all of this. While acknowledging that the crab climbs trees, critics say it only opens and eats damaged coconuts already on the ground.

What the Future Holds

Under the influence of modern civilization, will the Jarawas go the way of the Great Andamanese and the Onges​—gradual decline and perhaps eventual extinction? Only time will tell. But for centuries before outsiders came, they had been taking care of their God-given home and making use of the provisions in an unselfish way. Theirs was, indeed, a simple, peaceful way of life. Can we learn something from the Jarawas?

[Picture on page 24]

This tree-​climbing crab eats coconuts

Young People Ask . . .

Why Do My Parents Embarrass Me?

Right in the middle of biology class, you begin to feel sick. Much to your despair, the school calls home, and before long your mother is there​—clad in slippers, pink hair-​curlers, and those awful red sweatpants she wears around the house. Convinced you are in dire straits, she has rushed to your side without any concern for her appearance. But you have little appreciation for her rescue efforts. All you can think of is how silly and sloppy your mother looks in her outfit. And when she starts making a fuss over you in front of your classmates, you wish you could simply disappear. You are so embarrassed!

INCIDENTS like this may appear funny to onlookers. But you are not laughing. You feel an awkwardness, a pressure so great that you feel you could just die. Indeed, an expression was coined: ‘To die from embarrassment.’ And you are not the first to feel that way. The ancient Jews, for example, recognized the devastating potential of embarrassment. The Hebrew Talmud likened the shaming of a person in public to the shedding of his blood!

There are many sources of embarrassment, but many young people agree that there is none greater than their own parents. The list of things parents can do to humiliate you seems endless: publicly displaying affection, boasting of your accomplishments, acting like children in front of your friends, demanding that you “perform” before guests. Why, even the way your parents look may cause you shame! Little wonder, then, that some youths cringe at the thought of being seen with their parents.

Why, though, may your parents embarrass you so much? ‘Don’t they know any better?’ you may wonder.

Why They Embarrass You

Let’s analyze your own feelings in this regard. Being young, you are particularly vulnerable to embarrassment, as you have become increasingly aware that there are more people in this world than your immediate family. You want to be accepted by others​—especially your peers—​and you try hard to act “correctly.” Naturally, you do not want this acceptance undermined by embarrassing behavior on the part of your parents. As a youth named Linda said: ‘If your parents do something that embarrasses you, you worry: “What are my friends going to think of me?”’ Why, then, cannot your parents be more considerate of your feelings?

Psychologist Bernice Berk relates that one mother told her especially sensitive teenage son: “That’s my job, to embarrass you. My mother embarrassed me, and you’ll have to embarrass your children.” There’s more than a grain of truth in this rather blunt statement. No, being embarrassing isn’t hereditary, but something else is: imperfection.

Parents are imperfect. (Romans 3:23) They cannot be expected to look like fashion models, nor are they always in control of everything they say or do, any more than you are. They also have the right to relax from time to time and have fun. Occasionally acting younger than their age​—or even downright silly—​may be their way of coping with getting older. Oblivious of the effect this has on you, mom may mortify you by trying out the latest dance steps with your friends; dad may try to prove he can compete with teenagers on the basketball court. Embarrassing? Perhaps. But, for sure, they had no thought of hurting you.

Your parents also have your best interests at heart, and because of imperfection, they may overreact when your welfare seems threatened. For example, the Bible writer Luke tells of the time when 12-​year-​old Jesus attended the Passover in Jerusalem with his family. As his parents were returning home, they noticed he was missing. They made a diligent search for him, and “after three days they found him in the temple, sitting in the midst of the teachers and listening to them and questioning them.” No doubt Jesus was enjoying this conversation with men much older than he. Nevertheless, when his mother came on the scene, perhaps in full view of these principal men of the nation, she said: “Child, why did you treat us this way? Here your father and I in mental distress have been looking for you.”​—Luke 2:41-48.

Another factor to consider is that your parents have their own problems, some that you may not even be aware of. Perhaps financial worries, sickness, or other pressures are responsible for their behavior.

Finally, most parents are proud of their offspring. They enjoy showing them off. This, however, may lead to all kinds of disconcerting situations, such as your being asked to play the piano in front of your mother’s friends or having to endure hearing your father tell anyone who will listen how “brilliant” you are!

Learning to Cope

When her parents embarrass her, a youth named Tonia says, “I blush a lot.” While this may be a natural reaction, there are more productive ways to cope. Simply remembering some of the points brought out thus far may help temper your initial discomfort. (Proverbs 19:11) Consider also the following suggestions:

Stop Worrying: All the worrying in the world probably won’t change things much anyway. (Compare Matthew 6:27.) After all, you are not responsible for your parents; you are a separate person. ‘Each one must carry his own load,’ says Galatians 6:5. Besides, your predicament is probably not as bad as you imagine. Dr. Joyce L. Vedral observes that ‘every embarrassed teenager imagines that there is an audience watching him.’ However, most people are not all that interested. Adds Vedral: “Most people are more concerned about a pimple on their nose than they are about your whole family history.” Remember, too, that your peers also have anxieties about the impression that their parents are making!

Don’t Make a Bad Situation Worse: Says Proverbs 27:12: “A shrewd man sees trouble coming and lies low.” (The New English Bible) Calling attention to yourself by crying out, ‘Oh, Mom!’ only aggravates the situation. ‘Lying low’ by saying nothing may be wise.​—Ecclesiastes 3:7.

Accept Needed Discipline: Public correction may well embarrass you. But often the discipline is well-​deserved, and the embarrassment is simply a part of it. (Hebrews 12:11) What if the discipline seems uncalled for? Recall how Jesus handled his mother’s interruption. He remained calm and explained his situation. Indeed, the Bible says he “continued subject” to his parents. (Luke 2:49, 51) Why not try to do the same?

Talk to Your Parents: Kindly and respectfully tell them just what is bothering you. It works! Rosalee found in her case that “if you tell them how you feel, and if they think it’s reasonable, then they will usually try to correct themselves.” One way to help parents see your side of the issue is to ask them about the embarrassing experiences they had when they were younger. This might get them thinking about your situation.

Show Fellow Feeling: Just think of all the times you have embarrassed your parents! Did you do it maliciously? Of course not! So why feel that your parents are deliberately scheming to embarrass you?

Never Lose Your Sense of Humor: As one teen admitted: “Some things you have to try and laugh at; afterward they are kind of funny.” Yes, why take a mishap so seriously? Remember, there is “a time to laugh,” and sometimes showing a sense of humor takes the sting out of humiliation.​—Ecclesiastes 3:4.

Try as you may, however, you cannot entirely avoid embarrassment. But by applying the foregoing, you may very well be able to change the way you view so-​called embarrassing situations.

For example, author Jami Bernard relates: “My mother always made me hold her hand when we crossed the street, even when I was older. One day, I pulled her hand away, whining, ‘Mom, I don’t need this anymore.’ She turned to me and said, ‘I do.’ I don’t know whether she meant that she needed someone to lean on or that she missed the time when I was her ‘baby’ or that she wanted to make contact with me and didn’t quite know how. But now when I hold her hand to cross the street, I get a warm flush​—not of embarrassment but of love.”​—Seventeen magazine, December 1985.

Watching the World

BEACHES DESEGREGATED

On November 16, 1989, the president of South Africa declared that the country’s beaches would henceforth be open to people of all races. According to The New York Times, President F. W. de Klerk also promised that the Separate Amenities Act would be repealed soon; it went into effect 36 years ago and has been used to keep anyone who is not white out of certain public swimming pools, parks, libraries, and transportation systems. The country’s Conservative Party, unhappy about the prospect of a repeal of the act, accused de Klerk of putting South Africa on the road to becoming “totally racially mixed.” But some of the public facilities in question, including many beaches, were already quietly desegregated before the president’s speech. The repeal would not integrate the country’s segregated hospitals, schools, or neighborhoods.

AIDS IN THE 1990’S

At a conference in Marseilles, France, Dr. Jonathan Mann, director of the World Health Organization’s Global Programme on Aids, warned of a huge global spread of AIDS in the 1990’s. As many as ten million may now be infected with the virus in 152 countries around the world. By the year 2000, AIDS may kill six million people. The report in The Times of London notes that Africa is hardest hit. In Dar es Salaam, Tanzania, 42 percent of women working in bars and restaurants reportedly carry the virus. In Côte d’Ivoire, three out of ten adults were said to be infected. Of the crisis in the United States, the Hudson Institute warns that “a catastrophe is sweeping over America.” It forecasts that the AIDS virus will infect some 14.5 million Americans by 2002 and kill more Americans in the 1990’s than all the wars in the nation’s history combined.

“BIOLOGICAL FILTERS”

Dutch officials are taking innovative measures to clean up the pollution of the 3,027-​acre [1,225-​ha] lake Zoommeer in the Netherlands. They plan to use mussels as pollutant eaters. As reported in the International Herald Tribune, published in France, these mussels can act as “biological filters.” Experiments have shown that mussels consume and eliminate toxic chemicals and metals. Their contaminated wastes settle to the bottom where they can be dredged up. Scientists claim that the mussels can eliminate over 50 percent of PCBs (polychlorinated biphenyls) and 30 percent or more of cadmium from the water.

BAD DATES

Many laboratories that carry out radiocarbon dating of human artifacts are considerably less accurate than they claim to be, according to a study commissioned by Britain’s Science and Engineering Research Council. Samples of known age were sent to 38 labs around the world to be dated. Only seven of the labs produced results that were deemed “satisfactory.” Reports Britain’s magazine New Scientist: “The margin of error . . . may be two to three times as great as practitioners of the technique have claimed.” Such wide variance undercuts the dogmatic assertions often made about the age of ancient artifacts, especially when these contradict Bible chronology.

POACHING FOR ORIENTAL MEDICINES

Conservation officers in the Canadian wilderness have recently found more and more bear carcasses with the paws hacked off and the gallbladder missing. Maclean’s magazine of Canada reports that just these parts from one bear can earn a poacher up to $5,000. They are sold as ingredients for traditional Asian medicines, supposedly able to relieve pain and inflammation or to increase a person’s sexual prowess. They are a small part of a booming trade in organs and other parts of wild animals; not all of the trade is illegal. The velvet from the antlers of deer and elk, the reproductive organs of seals and tigers, dried seahorses, and even deer fetuses are all eagerly sought.

POLICING PARTIES

A wild party in Bracebridge, Ontario, Canada, has led to a new police program in the area. Parents left their 15-​year-​old son in charge of the home and his 10-​year-​old brother while they were away. He hosted a party for about a hundred youths, which soon got out of control. Neighbors called the police, but the boy wouldn’t let them in the house. Later, the ten-​year-​old called the police. The youths had forced him to drink beer until he was drunk and then had roasted his pet tropical fish and eaten it in front of him. By the time the police came back with a search warrant, the youths had done $13,000 worth of damage to the house. Since then, a new program enables parents who are leaving teenagers in charge of their home to notify police in advance, authorizing them to enter the home if they suspect any violations of drug, alcohol, or criminal laws.

DO-​IT-​YOURSELF ABORTIONS

In the wake of recent legislation that gave states in the United States more power to restrict abortions, scores of women’s self-​help groups are reviving and publicizing methods for women to perform abortions on themselves. The New York Times reports that hundreds of women have recently performed such abortions on one another, and that articles, books, and videotapes outlining the methods are widely distributed. One feminist told the Times that such options give women more power. But even some groups that favor abortion oppose the self-​help abortions, decrying the danger.

PRIESTLESS CHURCH SERVICES

The shortage of Catholic priests in the United States has grown so severe that a recent gathering of the country’s bishops approved a Sunday service for parishes without priests. A deacon or a layperson, male or female, may lead the new service. It will include hymns, psalms, Scripture reading, the Lord’s Prayer, and Holy Communion if bread is available that has been consecrated by a priest or brought from an actual Mass. The bishops emphasize that the new service is not a Mass. But as more parishes are forced to do without priests, the service may be in great demand.

CONFUSED TIGERS

Some 500 Bengal tigers in the Sundarban Tiger Reserve in India had been killing about 60 people a year, according to The New York Times. In an effort to reduce the number of human casualties, a new measure has been adopted by the Indian Forestry Service. Because of the claim that the tigers attack people only from behind, the Forestry Service issued face masks to be worn by workers on the backs of their heads. During a period of three years, no one wearing a mask was killed. In contrast, none of the 29 people killed by tigers during the last 18 months of the three-​year period were wearing the mask. One woodcutter was attacked from behind by a tiger when he sat down for lunch and took off his mask. Among local residents, there are some who argue that these “clever tigers cannot be fooled for long.”

UNTIMELY HUMOR

A recent movie, which brought its North American producers $125 million (U.S.) in just two months, portrays sadism and extreme violence in a humorous light. A review of the film in Brazil’s magazine Veja describes one example. A driver’s head is cut off by a surfboard. “As the decapitation is shown, the scene is more funny than shocking,” notes the review. “The result is that the countless scenes of shootings, murders, and massacres, all bathed in much blood, . . . convey comicalness instead of repugnance. The spectator winds up being entertained with violence. . . . The violence, the brutal lacerating of bodies, the inconceivable suffering, are transformed into an excuse for jokes.”

EMBARRASSING DEBTS

Europeans who fail to pay their bills may soon find someone dressed in an elaborate costume​—as a pink panther, for instance—​on their doorstep or at their workplace to remind them to make payments. The International Herald Tribune of Paris reports that it is all part of a new strategy that debt collectors in Spain launched a year ago to encourage debtors to pay up. The theory is that costumed debt collectors will draw so much attention that the borrower will be embarrassed into honoring his debts. The director of one agency claims that the strategy “nearly always” works.

From Our Readers

Catholic Reform I thought your article on religious history (August 22, 1989) was generally well-​written. However, I believe you’ve made a grave error in your blanket acquittal of Martin Luther from “Catholic anti-​Semitism.” Martin Luther produced quite a bit of hateful rhetoric against those of the Jewish race, calling them “a depraved and damned people” and even “devils.”

E. W., United States

The article focused on the corrupt practices of the Catholic Church, not the failings of Protestant reformers. Luther originally opposed Catholic anti-​Semitism. However, the German book “Die Juden und Martin Luther​—Martin Luther und die Juden,” (The Jews and Martin Luther—​Martin Luther and the Jews), by Heinz Kremers, explains: “At first Martin Luther was friendly toward the Jews, since he expected that they would convert to Christianity once the pure gospel was preached to them. When this hope went unfulfilled, he became a vehement enemy of the Jews.”​—ED.

Satanism I was shocked by the cover of the October 22, 1989, issue! I’ve always found the magazines to be so upbuilding. But this issue shocks and confuses me. Isn’t it wrong to have Satanic symbols in one’s home in any form?

P. W., United States

The subject of Satanism is indeed shocking. Nevertheless, we feel obliged to warn readers of ‘Satan’s designs,’ and at times this involves presenting subjects some might find offensive. (2 Corinthians 2:11) However, neither the text nor the illustrations​—including the depiction of Satanic symbols—​were presented in a way that either promoted Satanism or aroused curiosity in it. Rather, they served to help readers, including young ones, to abhor and avoid Satanic practices.​—ED.

I read with horror and amazement your report on Satanism, and I appreciate your bringing this vile sin to the attention of your readers. I have seen no evidence of Satanism in my area, but I will, nevertheless, keep alert for its possible appearance.

M. V. H., M.D., United States

Head Lice As a school nurse, dealing with the subject of head lice on a regular basis, I would agree with most of your article. (August 22, 1989) Unfortunately, you suggest shaving the head as a more effective way of treating a child. I personally would see shaving a child’s head to rid it of lice as dramatic and unnecessary. I also do not recommend the use of kerosene on the scalp. It is toxic and flammable, and surely hundreds of cases of head lice are better than one burnt child.

C. M., England

We appreciate these comments. “Awake!” does not recommend medical treatments. But since our journal is circulated worldwide and is read by people that may not have access to modern treatments, we merely reported on home remedies that some have claimed were successful in treating lice infestation. Modern medical authorities, though, do not recommend shearing off lice-​infested hair, viewing this as psychologically damaging and unnecessary. Cutting the hair is recommended only when the hair is excessively long or in such matted condition that combing it is impossible. Furthermore, medical authorities today do not recommend that kerosene be applied to the scalp. For example, Professor David Taplin of the University of Miami School of Medicine told “Awake!” that he viewed this practice as archaic.​—ED.

When AIDS Is No Threat

On the evening of October 3, 1984, young Kyle Bork was born seven weeks prematurely. His tiny lungs were too immature to function properly, so he was transferred 35 miles [56 km] away to the Children’s Hospital of Orange County, where equipment was available to care for such critically ill babies.

The doctor explained that Kyle’s blood would need to be replenished through a blood transfusion; otherwise he would in all probability die. Although it was very difficult for the parents, they stood firm on their Bible-based decision not to permit their baby to receive a transfusion. (Genesis 9:4, 5; Leviticus 17:10-14; Acts 15:28, 29) The doctor was understanding and cooperative. Yet, he said, if the situation became absolutely critical, he would obtain a court order and give a transfusion.

Remarkably, Kyle showed steady improvement, and by the ninth day, he was removed from the respirator. Two days later the parents took him home, and he developed into a happy, healthy child, as you can see from the picture. But that is not the end of the story.

Last year a Los Angeles television newscast reported that a number of children who had been in the Children’s Hospital of Orange County about the time Kyle was there had contracted AIDS from transfusions of tainted blood. The hospital was trying to contact the families of approximately 3,000 children so that they could be tested for the AIDS virus.

Immediately, Kyle’s parents called the hospital to make sure that he had not been transfused without their knowledge. Shortly, the hospital returned their call to assure them that he had not received any blood and so was in no danger of contracting AIDS. “We literally fell upon our knees and thanked Jehovah,” the parents explained, “for giving us his righteous laws and the strength to maintain our integrity in the face of such a test.”

A New Bible Encyclopedia

Many have been writing to express their appreciation for the new Bible encyclopedia that they have received. “What a wonderful aid to research the two new volumes Insight on the Scriptures!” enthuses a writer from Wisconsin, U.S.A. “It is indeed a wonderful gift, one that I shall forever cherish and endeavor to use to the full,” writes a woman from Jamaica, West Indies.

The two volumes of Insight on the Scriptures contain a total of 2,560 pages in clear, readable type. Its thousands of articles are alphabetically arranged and comprehensive. They deal with people, places, plant and animal life, notable events, figurative expressions in the Bible, and the record of God’s dealings with humankind.

Fifty-three subjects are developed as special features in full color. Many of these include maps and photographs of geographical locations and museum displays, as well as other artwork designed to help you to visualize Bible accounts. Valuable background and explanatory material is provided on upwards of 3,500 Bible texts. Subject, scripture, and map-​location indexes are included.

Receive this valuable, two-​volume encyclopedia by mailing in the accompanying coupon along with only $14.

Please send, postpaid, the two-​volume Bible encyclopedia Insight on the Scriptures. I enclose $14 (U.S.). (Outside the U.S.A., write to local Watch Tower branch for information.)